Younger girls/older guys.

[Dark~ness]

34 years :ohmy: Thats massive imo, not saying its wrong, or you cant be happy, but thats a huge differance

I don't think we will ever be able to be a couple, not due to the age difference though... It's due to the fact that he is married, and I don't intend to split up his marriage. I am in love with him, but I know I can never be with him. I have known him for about a year, we have grown a lot closer over the last few months. I have also just recently split up with my ex, and I'm not over him, so not looking to go into another relationship. I haven't told anyone that I am in love with this man who is so much older than me, due to the reaction I would get - I personally don't see anything wrong with it, but I know others do.

Adults should be dating other adults and let the teenagers date each other

I am an adult (21), and I date adults... who just seem to be a LOT older than me :cool:

D x

 

[Parvolex]

Hmm - I date a lot of older guys, and I'm only 18. Mainly for sex, but hey i have BPD traits.

1. I can converse with them more easily than those of my age.
2. I like dominant men - and it seems a lot of dominant men are older than me.
3. The ones I have met - are more respectful of my self-destructive nature.
4. I have older siblings namely 24, 27,28,31. So I'm used to older. ;d

I'm sure there's more. but whatever.
As long as i'm happy with dating older guys. i dont really care waht people think.

And there's worse things than this.. younger girl/older guy relationship. meh meh

 

[Izziebabystar]

you know that realy anoys me because when people are older and have a bigger age gap its ok
but just beacuse the man is older at that age its wrong
society sucks

 

[Satine]

There is a saying that goes, "Have no friends who are not your equal". The same goes for relationships. When I was 19 I dated, for one month, a 36 year old man. He told me (over and over again) that he'd be amazing in bed because he slept around a lot, so when he turned out to be rubbish at it, I thought it was my fault. But he wouldn't let a little thing like my self esteem get in the way of his own, even if that meant lying to me. I had no idea what I was doing wrong and my sex drive took a downward spiral to nothing.

I wondered what was wrong with me for a long time. So I'd say for that reason, a much younger girl or woman isn't a good match for an older man - she simply doesn't know when to know that he's got something wrong.

 

[yanke]

I'm sure you didn't do anything to lead her on. But it is fairly common for younger girls to have crushes on older guys -- even teachers.
You sound like a nice guy who doesn't want to hurt this girl's feelings. Nor do you want to be accused of something you didn't do.
Of course, there's no way for either of us to know if she is rational or a bit strange. So, there's no way we can tell if she will get weird if you tell her that you and she can't date.
However, I think you have to be kind to her, but at the same time be straight with her about the two of you not being able to date.
If she is asking you to go out, then you should tell her that you think she is a really nice girl, however, you are sure she would find you boring because your interests are probably so different from hers. Besides that, since you are sure she comes from a good family you are equally sure that her parents would not let her date someone so much older than she is. It is better for her at this point to find a boyfriend her own age, someone with whom she will have more in common.
I would suggest that you keep a journal and note the times and dates of all of your contacts with her. Just in case she ever threatens to accuse you of something. If there is any hint that she might, go to your parents and tell them what is going on. Then, contact the police to say that this girl is making threats toward you. While you don't want to get her in trouble, you do need to protect yourself.
Best wishes,

 

[camerondavid]

Well, for one, it's illegal. And two, there are just so many opportunities for him to take advantage of her. It's just not safe for a fifteen year old girl to date a twenty-two year old guy. For instance, my fifteen year old daughter, she thinks she's "in love" with this guy that is twenty-four years old. It drives me crazy. She met him online, which I also don't like. And then she met him in person. Could've killed them both for that one. But, she thinks she's absolutely in love with him. And it's just way beyond dangerous for her. She doesn't know every detail about this guy. He could end up taking advantage of her, big time. That's the big deal with a fifteen year old girl dating a guy so much older than her.

 

[thedeafmusician]

I know of a 17 year old who went out with a 12 year old girl for a while. They went alllllll the way. Then the school of the girl found out and they both got into all sorts of trouble. It sickened me, to be honest. She's just a kid. There has to be a line drawn somewhere. Some people are just too young for a relationship, full stop.

TDM

 

[monkeypunchluff]

There is always a line, like if she's really young.
Yeah, a bit sexist, but I don't really care if the woman is older (or by how much). I guess it's because guys are generally more focused on the pursuit of sex.

And of course, if she's 20, and he's 92, then the reasons for the relationship are a mite obvious.

Or one is in a position of power over another one.

Still, as long as you can relate to the person you're with, and enjoy their company as equals, I don't think there is anything wrong with an age gap.

 

[xTheBlondex]

- First post in a hell of a long time, HELLO!-

From personal experience I lost my virginity at around the age of 14.. to someone 18/19 at the time I thought I was 'in love'. I think all girls crave love and especially when your quite alot younger you think that sex means that they love you or will love you after... I thought that was the case and it took me along time to realise that what I thought was wrong.

I think that theres nothing wrong with an age gap in a relationship but you should be at the consential age or older. There are studies that link girls who have had under age sex when they were younger to depression ect.

I think the fact that I had underage sex has contributed to some of the issues I have.. because I realised that I was being 'used' by these older men for sex and not because they loved me or liked being with me. It made me paranoid and left me feeling unwanted.. lowered my self esteem and just overall gave me a grave view of life. :poke:

 

[abyss]

the thing i always worry about in a situation where there is a minor involved with an adult is the huge oppertunity this presents to people looking to manipulate someone. i have "daddy issues" and dated guys in their 20s all through high school. i thought it was just because i was SO mature, but really it was an oppertunity for some of them to have easy access since younger girls looking for older guys usually have some emotional vaulnerabilities. for some it was an enablment for their own immaturity. if they dated girls at their maturity level then they never had to grow up.

i'm not saying it cant work. not saying that love can only occur between two like-aged people. just saying its a dangerous area where you are more likely to be hurt and used then find that special someone.

 

[Pingu]

i see these 15 year olds dating 30 year olds, and WTF?
the 30 year old should get a life and maybe pick one his own age.. maturity doesnt matter at this point.. i'm not trying to hurt anyone on the forum, but its just sick.. only a looser would go for girls at so young age