Borderline Personality Disorder | What is BPD? | Signs of BPD

[Christa D]

I took DBT 18 years ago and I haven't cut until last month. But I find that I had a very good therapist and took the class for a year and half (I'm deaf). and glad I did. It's help me a lot. Now I have to re learn the DBT. I have Marsha Linehan Skill Training Manual for Treating Borderline Personality disorder. I need to find a class in my area so I can go.

 

[Christa D]

When I was first diagnosis like 15-20 years ago gosh I was doing self harming a lot. What I don't get is why do I keep pushing people away. I don't know if it's because I will get hurt (did in the past) or it's the Borderline. I hate doing that . I used to dissociate but haven't in a long time.
I feel like I being abandonment and left alone, def spending more than I should. I feel terror like he or she hate me . I meet more of the critical for BPD.

 

[Aurelia]

What I don't get is why do I keep pushing people away. I don't know if it's because I will get hurt (did in the past) or it's the Borderline.

It's both.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/...hook-ups-oxytocin-and-the-brain-s-quest-trust

 

[clairedelune]

Sometimes, I get so enraged to the point that I intentionally hurt others mostly emotionally. But that guilt feeling afterwards, leaves me so depressed I feel like I am the worst person in the world. ⛷

 

[Aurelia]

Sometimes, I get so enraged to the point that I intentionally hurt others mostly emotionally. But that guilt feeling afterwards, leaves me so depressed I feel like I am the worst person in the world. ⛷

I've done the same thing. It's called "black and white thinking" because you see people as either completely good or completely bad, depending on whether you feel hurt by what they did to you or not. And when it comes to yourself, when your intense emotions subside, you start feeling guilty because you realize you should have reacted differently. But you have trouble realizing this when you feel those intense emotions, though.

 

[clairedelune]

I've done the same thing. It's called "black and white thinking" because you see people as either completely good or completely bad, depending on whether you feel hurt by what they did to you or not. And when it comes to yourself, when your intense emotions subside, you start feeling guilty because you realize you should have reacted differently. But you have trouble realizing this when you feel those intense emotions, though.

That is so right. When I have these intense emotions, all I want to do is just lash them out onto that person without caring if he/she might get hurt or not. Is this somewhat related to BPD? I'm scared it might be.

 

[Aurelia]

That is so right. When I have these intense emotions, all I want to do is just lash them out onto that person without caring if he/she might get hurt or not. Is this somewhat related to BPD? I'm scared it might be.

I'm not a diagnostician, of course, but it does sound like it could be a characteristic of BPD because I was diagnosed with it, and I do the same thing. But it's not the end of the world if it is. BPD is considered highly treatable nowadays with the right therapy, and it gets better by itself with time, especially if you are aware of your own behaviors as it sounds that you are.

 

[Angie74]

I'm sick of this stupid disorder. I'm beginning to wonder if I AM my personality disorder. If it's a disorder of one's unique personality, then it' saying there's something fundamentally wrong with who you are as a person. It cuts right to the core of who you are.

 

[Angie74]

CBT, DBT. In my humble opinion, they are essentially useless. They don't get rid of your personality disorder, and they don't make coping with it any easier.

 

[Auerbach]

I was diagnosed with BPD this past October, and it has gotten severe since then.

 

[Angie74]

This disease might as well be a death sentence.

 

[Aurelia]

I had a diagnosis of BPD after another suicide attempt by a psychiatrist in hospital.
My regular physcologist disagreed.
I do fit many of the above symptoms as listed above. Not that is bothers me. But i have been with my physcologist for 3 years and I'm not getting any better. (if not worse)

Why did he/she disagree?

 

[Sasg]

I suspect I have bpd. But I can’t tell my family and I can’t see my psychiatrist until I got back to school. It sucks having to live like this. Knowing that the things I do, I can’t control. I get punished and yell at by my family for being impulsive and explosive but I can’t help it. And they don’t even believe in mental illness (even though my mom is a gd psychologist. Like what? How can you study mental illness in other people and not recognize it in your own child?). But I am falling apart. This disorder is tearing me to shreds and there’s nothing I can do about it. My life is hell and it’s gonna stay that way until this goes away which it likely won’t. Unlike most mental illnesses bpd is based in genetics and the chemicals our brains produce, it’s not situationally-bound like ptsd.

 

[Sasg]

This disease might as well be a death sentence.

Hah yeah retweet

 

[agwoodliffe]

Most interesting thing I learned about BPD is that, unlike how they're depicted in the movies, sufferers are rarely the outgoing/chatty type. I've met multiple people with BPD and every single one of them were introverts.

 

[Nick]

I can't speak for anyone else, but I'd much rather talk to a plant or a dog than a person. People are difficult and at this point being alone seems my only option anyway.

 

[agwoodliffe]

Hah yeah retweet

Wrong. Stage IV cancer is a death sentence. Borderline Personality Disorder is a LEARNED problem. Sure, medication may be needed to control any comorbid depression/mood swings, but the core aspects of BPD can be sorted through behavioural therapy.

 

[agwoodliffe]

I can't speak for anyone else, but I'd much rather talk to a plant or a dog than a person. People are difficult and at this point being alone seems my only option anyway.

It's interesting, because I've recently read in literature that sufferers of BPD have a belief that people are malicious in nature. Can you relate?

 

[Angie74]

Huge over-generalization. About the behavior therapy, that is. Have you looked at the suicide completion rates for this disorder??

 

[agwoodliffe]

I suspect I have bpd. But I can’t tell my family and I can’t see my psychiatrist until I got back to school. It sucks having to live like this. Knowing that the things I do, I can’t control. I get punished and yell at by my family for being impulsive and explosive but I can’t help it. And they don’t even believe in mental illness (even though my mom is a gd psychologist. Like what? How can you study mental illness in other people and not recognize it in your own child?). But I am falling apart. This disorder is tearing me to shreds and there’s nothing I can do about it. My life is hell and it’s gonna stay that way until this goes away which it likely won’t. Unlike most mental illnesses bpd is based in genetics and the chemicals our brains produce, it’s not situationally-bound like ptsd.

Wrong here too. ALL mental disorders are genetic. It's just a case of whether those genes are set off by bad experiences. For instance, I recently found out that I have several at-risk genes for depression, but interestingly, the depression only comes on if exposed to trauma as a child (which I was).
If you have BPD, you are lucky. It can be dealt with a lot easier than say low-functioning autism, or severe schizophrenia.