BPD Support Thread

[Aurelia]

That brings up an interesting tangent actually. Have any of you heard of apgantasua?

I have not. What is it?

 

[Gwyrdd]

The inability to recreate senses in your mind.

I'm asking because I know 4 people with at least some form of it, and we're all ND.

MY bf is adhd and has complete aphantasia, can't imagine any pictures smells etc in his head.

I'm bpd, cptsd and I can only see images, no sound, no tastes, no feeling or smells

Autistic friend can recreate sounds but nothing else.

Second autistic friend also full aphantasia.

Seems most common in neurodivergents so I was wondering if anyone else has it lol

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

The inability to recreate senses in your mind.

I'm asking because I know 4 people with at least some form of it, and we're all ND.

MY bf is adhd and has complete aphantasia, can't imagine any pictures smells etc in his head.

I'm bpd, cptsd and I can only see images, no sound, no tastes, no feeling or smells

Autistic friend can recreate sounds but nothing else.

Second autistic friend also full aphantasia.

Seems most common in neurodivergents so I was wondering if anyone else has it lol

I know I don't have it because I'm a mere hallucination

 

[Aurelia]

The inability to recreate senses in your mind.

I'm asking because I know 4 people with at least some form of it, and we're all ND.

MY bf is adhd and has complete aphantasia, can't imagine any pictures smells etc in his head.

I'm bpd, cptsd and I can only see images, no sound, no tastes, no feeling or smells

Autistic friend can recreate sounds but nothing else.

Second autistic friend also full aphantasia.

Seems most common in neurodivergents so I was wondering if anyone else has it lol

I'm pretty sure I can actually recreate all those things. Possibly even some form of synesthesia at times.

 

[Gwyrdd]

I know I don't have it because I'm a mere hallucination

Ironically, a lack of voluntary recall does not preclude hallucinations actually. Its an inability to ACCESS the ability to recreate things. Your mind can still do it without your permission.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Ironically, a lack of voluntary recall does not preclude hallucinations actually. Its an inability to ACCESS the ability to recreate things. Your mind can still do it without your permission.

Maybe I really am a figment if your imagination because you hallucinate sometimes. If I'm not real this makes it easier.

 

[Gwyrdd]

I'm pretty sure I can actually recreate all those things. Possibly even some form of synesthesia at times.

I want to say I'm jealous, but I actually enjoy not being able to accidentally recreate bad smells or tastes, or refeel pain. My recognition is unaffected simply my imagination. So I think it's partially a blessing.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

I want to say I'm jealous, but I actually enjoy not being able to accidentally recreate bad smells or tastes, or refeel pain. My recognition is unaffected simply my imagination. So I think it's partially a blessing.

Then you can't remember the sound of my voice. Lucky for you

 

[Aurelia]

I want to say I'm jealous, but I actually enjoy not being able to accidentally recreate bad smells or tastes, or refeel pain. My recognition is unaffected simply my imagination. So I think it's partially a blessing.

I mean, obviously I try not to recreate shit I don't like lol, but yeah, sometimes it happens by accident. Like, for example, I'm smoking a cigarette and for some reason I'm sensing the smell of crack instead...and not because I'm willing it to happen. It's triggering as fuck sometimes.

 

[Gwyrdd]

Then you can't remember the sound of my voice. Lucky for you

Actually not ENTIRELY true. I say I'm 4/5 aphant to make it easier to understand for people. If I concentrate hard enough for longer enough I can recreate some semblance of sound. It's just easier to say I can't. Kinda like how telling people I'm depressed is easier than bpd

 

[Gwyrdd]

I mean, obviously I try not to recreate shit I don't like lol, but yeah, sometimes it happens by accident. Like, for example, I'm smoking a cigarette and for some reason I'm sensing the smell of crack instead...and not because I'm willing it to happen. It's triggering as fuck sometimes.

Yeah, that's exactly the blessing I mean. Or if I eat something absolutely disgusting, I take a drink of water and the taste is gone forever until/unless I eat it again. That kind of thing is nice.

 

[Aurelia]

Damn. Off topic, but Kant (the philosopher dude) was one smart motherfucker.

"Treat people as an end and not as a means to an end".

If everyone actually did that, the majority of humanity wouldn't be such a piece of shit. And I'm guilty of this as well on some level; I'm sure we all are. But this is literally like THE formula for how to live. And no one uses it.

 

[Gwyrdd]

So hypothetically if I take xanax, klonopin AND drank, how fucked would I be for the rest of the night lol

I know the effects of all three just never taken them together before.

 

[Gwyrdd]

Let's also maybe assume I took more than just those three.

 

[Aurelia]

Let's also maybe assume I took more than just those three.

Lol @ maybe assume.

Honestly, I'm not sure HOW fucked up you'd be, but I'd definitely say pretty fucked up. Just be careful and don't take too much to the point that you knock yourself out.

 

[Gwyrdd]

As it is, anti-anxiety ended up being anti-emotions actually. Maybe besides humour anyway lol. But yeah I already kinda feel pretty messed up. And I'm thinking the kpin was a bad idea but oh well.

 

[Aurelia]

As it is, anti-anxiety ended up being anti-emotions actually. Maybe besides humour anyway lol. But yeah I already kinda feel pretty messed up. And I'm thinking the kpin was a bad idea but oh well.

Kpins definitely do make me more rational and stable. Go figure.

 

[Gwyrdd]

Rational yes. Stable... depends on definition. I personally think being completely logical and ignoring emotions is generally bad, but it is what it is right now. I'm more talking about the long lasting effects however.

 

[Aurelia]

Rational yes. Stable... depends on definition. I personally think being completely logical and ignoring emotions is generally bad, but it is what it is right now. I'm more talking about the long lasting effects however.

Oh, it definitely is bad. Being 100% logical and feeling no emotion at all would quickly turn our lives to shit. Emotions are, themselves, pretty important, as they help us decide what is generally more/less beneficial to us. But I didn't mean stable as in emotionless, just able to tolerate the emotions that surface.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

I felt like I was going to throw up and pass out in the shower, and my heart was racing. My mom said that's basically because I'm too fat. But I don't think that's normal regardless of my weight.