BPD Support Thread

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Oh, and when anyone says "I don't want to be mean, but" they totally are. Like some support would be nice instead of people picking on all of my failings all the time.

 

[Gwyrdd]

I felt like I was going to throw up and pass out in the shower, and my heart was racing. My mom said that's basically because I'm too fat. But I don't think that's normal regardless of my weight.

Not sure how that even makes sense anyway. Extra weight increasing heart rate starts to feel normal so an increased heart rate that you can feel is bad either way. Regardless though I don't think it's necessary to say.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Not sure how that even makes sense anyway. Extra weight increasing heart rate starts to feel normal so an increased heart rate that you can feel is bad either way. Regardless though I don't think it's necessary to say.

She didn't say I was fat exactly, she said my weight puts a strain on my heart. But that's wrong in a way, because my blood pressure has always been normal. I wasn't thin before and I wasn't anything like this. Obviously it's from other causes.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

I saw this pop up on Facebook memories:

Post a gif of what you think it's like inside my head.

And no one answered...wonder why

 

[Aurelia]

I felt like I was going to throw up and pass out in the shower, and my heart was racing. My mom said that's basically because I'm too fat. But I don't think that's normal regardless of my weight.

Ugh...that's so fucking unnecessary, first of all, of your mom...

And something similar has been happening to me the past couple of days, just not in the shower, but while I sleep. I don't think it's due to nightmares...at least, I don't remember any. But every time I seem to wake up, my heart just races like crazy. And this typically doesn't happen when I have my klonopin, which I still do. This is just a random thing for the past 2 days now.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Ugh...that's so fucking unnecessary, first of all, of your mom...

And something similar has been happening to me the past couple of days, just not in the shower, but while I sleep. I don't think it's due to nightmares...at least, I don't remember any. But every time I seem to wake up, my heart just races like crazy. And this typically doesn't happen when I have my klonopin, which I still do. This is just a random thing for the past 2 days now.

That's scary, do you know what's causing it at all?

 

[Aurelia]

That's scary, do you know what's causing it at all?

Not really. My guess, however, would be subconscious stress that I'm choosing not to let surface because I don't want to face it lol. This is something that I was actually just discussing with someone...that avoiding pain (which I'm quite guilty of) only causes us more pain. I need to get back to meditating.

 

[Aurelia]

On another note, why the fuck am I still up at almost 4am? Granted, I'm sure after I come back from work, I'll exhaust myself into sleep, and just fall over, but that's not exactly normal.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Not really. My guess, however, would be subconscious stress that I'm choosing not to let surface because I don't want to face it lol. This is something that I was actually just discussing with someone...that avoiding pain (which I'm quite guilty of) only causes us more pain. I need to get back to meditating.

I would try that, but I never seem to be able to clear my mind enough to be able to focus.

 

[Aurelia]

Are people on dating sites really that fucking stupid? If I'm saying I'm looking for long-term relationships and you've checked off short-term dating and hookups, what do you think my answer would be as far as whether or not I want to chat?

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

On another note, why the fuck am I still up at almost 4am? Granted, I'm sure after I come back from work, I'll exhaust myself into sleep, and just fall over, but that's not exactly normal.

Because you're talking to me and I'm a delight, obviously.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Are people on dating sites really that fucking stupid? If I'm saying I'm looking for long-term relationships and you've checked off short-term dating and hookups, what do you think my answer would be as far as whether or not I want to chat?

If you have a pic up, some of them probably want to get you into bed. But I can understand why that would be frustrating. Some people just aren't operating with full brain power, or really any at all.

 

[Aurelia]

I would try that, but I never seem to be able to clear my mind enough to be able to focus.

I recommend reading up a bit more on what meditation is. The very point of it isn't to clear your mind, but to deal with whatever horrors your mind starts coming up with and simply sitting with it without avoiding it or trying to change it.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

In my stories, I'm making all of the sex scenes into premium choices. So if they really want to read them, they'll have to cough up the diamonds. haha

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

I'm also trying to make sure they're interesting enough to be worth that. So I have to get descriptive and I can only rely on my imagination there.

 

[Aurelia]

If you have a pic up, some of them probably want to get you into bed. But I can understand why that would be frustrating. Some people just aren't operating with full brain power, or really any at all.

Yeah...I have quite a few pictures up, but for fucks sake, my profile literally says--the very FIRST line, so they can't miss it--that I'm not looking for anything casual.

 

[Aurelia]

In my stories, I'm making all of the sex scenes into premium choices. So if they really want to read them, they'll have to cough up the diamonds. haha

Haha. I'd pay to read that.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Yeah...I have quite a few pictures up, but for fucks sake, my profile literally says--the very FIRST line, so they can't miss it--that I'm not looking for anything casual.

Well you know, when guys are thinking with their dicks, it can be hard to concentrate on anything else.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Haha. I'd pay to read that.

I feel like I have to think harder because I don't have any experience to rely on. So maybe that makes it more difficult to write the scenes. But it comes down to my imagination.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Just a snippet:

He runs his hands over your body like you're a work of art that he is revering.

Like I'm not sure if it's any good, but it's worth a shot. haha