Today Rocky, I know how you feel, in fact for the last 5days I've felt the same. But we won't give up just yet, we'll struggle on one day at a time until it gets better. Plus too many people love us
I really do understand and it does get overwhelming, but think of the good days, like when you went rock climbing, you had fun. There'll be other days like that. Love you my friend ((hugs))
I think that it will get easier over time and you will need to fight less. Dont think that how it is now is how it will always be. Maybe if some things havent helped so far then think about whether there are other things can do in addition or instead of. Maybe can experiment a bit with what things work for you and find the best "path" for u. And maybe really work out what things have made you happy in the past and how u can do them again and much more in future. Im thinking abou trying to get back into playing some sport. But most of all, be kind to yourself, look after yourself, and keep chatting here on SF. We would miss u even if u were away for a week.
Best of luck with your new counsellor, please keep yourself safe and try your best to hold it together until your appointment, you know SF is here for you...you're an amazing person, I wish you all the best and in the meantime im here for you ((hug))