Sometimes I feel like I will feel the effects of the rape and sexual abuse forever. It has definitely changed me as a person and the way I see things. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever be normal again and it all happened when I was so young that I don't think I was ever normal to begin with. I feel so confused, getting triggered by things that seem to not bother other people and stil feeling uncomfortable around men, even my own friends who have never tried anything and have always been there for me. Basically, the whole thing makes me feel so weird about myself sometimes that I want to crawl out of my skin.