Has anyone else been dumped by their partner when they found out you were depressed?

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Arwen

Active Member
#1
Basically, I got really drunk when i went out with my boyfriend and his friends clubbing a few weeks ago, and i cried and told him that i hated myself and that i couldn't cope with everything anymore. Even worse, i was so drunk that i don't remember doing it. Then 4 days later after being really cold and rude to me, he broke up with me.

I didn't expect him to react that way at all. is that normal?
has anyone else experienced something similar?


Plus, at that point I hadn't seen a counsellor yet, and hadn't been diagnosed and didn't even tell him how long i'd felt this way. For all he knew i could have just been drunk crying, and it makes me sad that he didn't even want anything to do with me when he found out. And that he could break up with me in such a horrible way, considering he knew how much i was hurting already.

Additionally, he's been through some stuff himself when he was a child, which i won't go into because although this is confidential and anonymous, i did promise i would never tell anyone. But yeah, so i thought that maybe he might be more understanding than some people, but clearly not

i know that being depressed is obviously an issue, and because we hadn't been together very long, but he had told me he loved me, so i thought that would count for something?
I wouldn't break up with someone i am in love with because they are depressed without talking to them about it first, or before it became an issue, which i never would have let it do. i would never have made him feel like he needed to cheer me up, and i wouldn't have burdened him with my problems when i was feeling low.

I just wish we could have talked about it more.
Or that he said something like, "i can't support you through this, even though i love you," or "you;ve got to figure this out on your own, and get some professional help"
 

Arwen

Active Member
#3
Thanks for your reply Johnathan.
Maybe; i never asked him if he ever went to see a counsellor or anything when he was younger, or whether he was still affected by it a lot, but it wasn't directly related to depression or suicide, but he might have gone through some similar stuff a result of what happened to him. But i can't help feeling like it is still quite an upsetting way to react.
 

Emma bella

Well-Known Member
#5
About to post something of my own but saw your title and had to comment. Yes completely understand. Years ago someone who claimed to love me and wanted to marry me allegedly dumped me very abruptly and by sleeping with their ex after I confided mental health problems and childhood stuff and then told their friends about it which is how it got back to e even though it was supposed to be in confidence and I had put my trust in them. We were very young but it wasn't an excuse. I could even understand the decision you end it was a bit lame but telling people was really shallow. X
 

Arwen

Active Member
#7
About to post something of my own but saw your title and had to comment. Yes completely understand. Years ago someone who claimed to love me and wanted to marry me allegedly dumped me very abruptly and by sleeping with their ex after I confided mental health problems and childhood stuff and then told their friends about it which is how it got back to e even though it was supposed to be in confidence and I had put my trust in them. We were very young but it wasn't an excuse. I could even understand the decision you end it was a bit lame but telling people was really shallow. X
that's awful, i'm so sorry, i really don't understand some people :( especially as that must have been really difficult for you to tell them, and for them to then react that way is terrible. but i guess it just shows that in the end they weren't worth it.
if he cant handle you at your worst then he does not deserve you at your best. (S. Alder)
 

Emma bella

Well-Known Member
#8
Ah thank you. I see it is as revealing their true colours and doing us all a massive favour by going away. We were getting sick of each other anyway. Hope your moving on from him he too immature x
 
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