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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
- Start date
Guilty. I know my needy friend wanted me to go see the new Michael Jackson movie and have dinner with him (I'm his only friend.) on Saturday. Saturday I had promised to do something with my other friend. But today I am going to see the movie with yet another friend, making the first friend reveal loneliness and upset that I am seeing the movie today while he is working. But the third friend and i have no other plans other than to hang out today like we usually do on Wednesday so I decided on seeing the movie today.
So I am riddled with guilt having plans for Saturday and going to see the movie today. Good Catholic school upbringing.
So I am riddled with guilt having plans for Saturday and going to see the movie today. Good Catholic school upbringing.
@nicktheundoer
I hope things will work out somehow
I hope things will work out somehow
You're not overlooked because we see you. You're not alone because you've got us. You're not unwanted because we want you here. You're not obsolete because you're a human being not a machine.
I'm sorry you feel awful though.
Sending hugs if you would like hugs
I'm sorry you feel awful though.
Sending hugs if you would like hugs
Getting to know you on this forum and I think you're a great person Avid. I hope all those negative feelings go away soon. 
You have been here for many of us @nicktheundoer and I hope you can feel the support coming toward you from SF. It sounds as though something very difficult has happened - I'm sorry. Take care as best you can, keep believing in yourself.
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I feel scared. Last I checked the clock it was 19:30 and I was doing my floss/brush teeth routine. next thing I know it's 23:00 and I'm not the slightest bit tired. So it's like 3 hours or so missing. I can't say 3.5 because I do remember some things, but it was basically that I was doing housework, however, something happened and I reorganized a cabinet that I hadn't planned on and cleaned off some other clutter on a table top - which had to be sorted and then I had to decide where things should go. So that might explain the time, but I was not aware of time passing. I know that's common for ADHD brains, but this is getting worse lately. I'm anxious because I'm anxious, which is really just how that disorder works.
I should be sleepy by now, but I'm like, "I could pass a calculus test right now" - level of wide awake. If only I could feel this way at 06:00 in the morning, I'd be goddam Superman. It does occur to me that I'm probably pushing my bedtime even further out by worrying about not getting enough sleep though. I have a plan for tomorrow and I'm going to see how long I can go without any of my avoidance behaviors. Those include being on Youtube and facebook, etc. I don't think checking in here particularly counts because I'm not doing that to escape. I'm trying to track how my mood is changing and what works. I do have to watch out for getting into an avoidance loop when I'm super anxious though. That's when I post like 7 comments over the course of 2.5 hours. So, the plan for tomorrow is to be more chill and not try to get the to-do list items done. Instead the focus will be on troubleshooting what I'm afraid of when I just can't get around to anything future related. Whether it's career or other areas, I end up doing chores and errands and watching an array of YT videos that I never even remember anyway.
Oh dear. Another dang wall of words. IDK. I just feel like my life would be a lot better if it could be over with by the end of the year.
I should be sleepy by now, but I'm like, "I could pass a calculus test right now" - level of wide awake. If only I could feel this way at 06:00 in the morning, I'd be goddam Superman. It does occur to me that I'm probably pushing my bedtime even further out by worrying about not getting enough sleep though. I have a plan for tomorrow and I'm going to see how long I can go without any of my avoidance behaviors. Those include being on Youtube and facebook, etc. I don't think checking in here particularly counts because I'm not doing that to escape. I'm trying to track how my mood is changing and what works. I do have to watch out for getting into an avoidance loop when I'm super anxious though. That's when I post like 7 comments over the course of 2.5 hours. So, the plan for tomorrow is to be more chill and not try to get the to-do list items done. Instead the focus will be on troubleshooting what I'm afraid of when I just can't get around to anything future related. Whether it's career or other areas, I end up doing chores and errands and watching an array of YT videos that I never even remember anyway.
Oh dear. Another dang wall of words. IDK. I just feel like my life would be a lot better if it could be over with by the end of the year.