-
IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Please read THIS THREAD about a rebrand for SF.
How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
- Start date
I'm still unsure how I feel in general. Every day is different and, sometimes, so are moments of the day. Today I'm mostly okay, although I had some suicidal thoughts this morning. I'm dealing with very unpleasant reminiscences that won't leave me be. I have to let them go and let the feeling pass, but damn that's hard.
Wow. I would consider buying a lotto ticket. I don’t know what it’s called in the UK, but every country I have visited has a form of it.
Getting a med refilled without any issues is super lucky. 🍀 I’m also glad you’re getting a break from the pain and that the meetings went better than expected.
My thing with pizza is soda pop. Dr Pepper or Cherry Coke.
Getting a med refilled without any issues is super lucky. 🍀 I’m also glad you’re getting a break from the pain and that the meetings went better than expected.
My thing with pizza is soda pop. Dr Pepper or Cherry Coke.
I’m not a parent, but I think that’s a healthy way to look at it. It’s going to be bittersweet, because although there’s a sense of loss, you can also be proud of yourself for raising her to the point where she’s getting an education.
I have family who have children, so I have that tangential perspective. In my role as uncle, I think it’s hard enough to just keep them out of jail and alive. No parent can be perfect. The thing is that she is better off than most, and I think that is appropriate to find satisfaction in.
I have family who have children, so I have that tangential perspective. In my role as uncle, I think it’s hard enough to just keep them out of jail and alive. No parent can be perfect. The thing is that she is better off than most, and I think that is appropriate to find satisfaction in.
I’m an expert in violent nightmares, however only with respect to my own mind. I don’t remember if you said the nightmares were about something that happened to you in the past or not. Mine were a symptom of PTSD. Getting treatment for that, and finding a workable antidepressant combination is what stopped the nightmares.
Well, that and booze or anything else that could make me pass out. 😵💫
My field research on this topic, however, has found that suppressing feelings through chemistry is not going to work in the long run.
Well, that and booze or anything else that could make me pass out. 😵💫
My field research on this topic, however, has found that suppressing feelings through chemistry is not going to work in the long run.
Cool. We have too many lotteries here. A national lotto, Euromillions and something call Set for Life - win £10,000 a month for 30 years (I actually like this one and the ticket is the cheapest for the best odds overall). They recently brought the Powerball over here, it was kind of fun when the prize was half a billion, I bought one ticket and didn't win. But now it's something like 24 million and the prize is paid over 30 years, so its twice the price of a ticket for a worse deal than some of the other lotteries, and also worse odds.
I only seem to win negative lotteries though - I have had 2 medical conditions now which the incidence is around 1 in 100,000 - getting them both in a lifetime would be one in ten billion 😄 or 34 times less likely than winning Powerballl! Lucky soul I am!
(All maths is for fun, done on back of a paper bag by AI, and not completely to be take seriously for any mathematicians out there!)
I only seem to win negative lotteries though - I have had 2 medical conditions now which the incidence is around 1 in 100,000 - getting them both in a lifetime would be one in ten billion 😄 or 34 times less likely than winning Powerballl! Lucky soul I am!
(All maths is for fun, done on back of a paper bag by AI, and not completely to be take seriously for any mathematicians out there!)
I am a tad apprehensive. A full 72 hours off the antibiotics. It was within the next 12 hour period after stopping, when the disease has come back each time previously. Strangely predictable. I'm already interpreting phantom body sensations and feelings as bacteria getting a foothold inside me again. Of course this is Friday night so any relapse necessitates going through out of hours care, which means chaos and the culture not even being sent to lab. I'll keep fingers crossed eh. I will be quite worried if it comes back after 2 weeks solid of antibiotics. I will pray that it doesn't. Ok worse that can happen is I wait half a day and then get on some new antibiotics - but long term this isn't a strategy and sooner or later they will start becoming resistant in vivo.... So I will go to bed and hope tomorrow is boringly normal and the 2 week course put a stop to this nonsense.
dang, I was going to critique your calculations there. lol
This is only because I am trying to work out some probability measures of my own, which I thought would be simple, but when I tried to prove that rigorously a whole can of worms exploded in my face. Except that they were not worms, but a swarm of very angry hornets, 😱
dang, I was going to critique your calculations there. lol This is only because I am trying to work out some probability measures of my own, which I thought would be simple, but when I tried to prove that rigorously a whole can of worms exploded in my face. Except that they were not worms, but a swarm of very angry hornets, 😱
This is only because I am trying to work out some probability measures of my own, which I thought would be simple, but when I tried to prove that rigorously a whole can of worms exploded in my face. Except that they were not worms, but a swarm of very angry hornets, 😱
Right now I’m loopy from sleep deprivation. After insomnia for the whole night Wednesday into Thursday, I got 3 hours last night, and it wasn’t for lack of trying. My body had different plans that I did not get a vote on.
On the bright side, I’m meditating more, because when I have missed 20 hours of sleep over 7 days, I’m not useful for much else. Even housework is dicey because my balance is worse than usual. Actually had a close call with an injury last night, and was only saved by the fact that I fell over in the direction of my bed instead of something less forgiving.
On the bright side, I’m meditating more, because when I have missed 20 hours of sleep over 7 days, I’m not useful for much else. Even housework is dicey because my balance is worse than usual. Actually had a close call with an injury last night, and was only saved by the fact that I fell over in the direction of my bed instead of something less forgiving.
I'm awaiting a diagnosis for some lesions that a CAT scan revealed on my liver. My personal physician and the oncologist are of the opinion that they're malignant.
There's a PET scan scheduled, an ENT scan and a biopsy too.
The oncologist thinks I'm already at stage 4.
Of course I'm thinking about the end of life.
If symptoms get too bad, the option of the quick exit seems like the obvious choice.
There's no significant other to leave behind. No children. No close friends. And I don't really enjoy my life anyway.
I'm 73 years old.
On the positive side my church friends and several people from a volunteer group have all told me they'll be eager to help and that I mustn't think I'm alone.
But I do feel pretty alone.
There's a PET scan scheduled, an ENT scan and a biopsy too.
The oncologist thinks I'm already at stage 4.
Of course I'm thinking about the end of life.
If symptoms get too bad, the option of the quick exit seems like the obvious choice.
There's no significant other to leave behind. No children. No close friends. And I don't really enjoy my life anyway.
I'm 73 years old.
On the positive side my church friends and several people from a volunteer group have all told me they'll be eager to help and that I mustn't think I'm alone.
But I do feel pretty alone.
I'm sure these are symptomatic of PTSD; even CPTSD would be more applicable as there are multiple and prolonged layers to it. Past abuse I've endured has come to the surface (again), and then more recently I had a seizure at work for which I'm on medical leave, threatening my livelihood and career as an RN. I've had two prior seizures on the job almost 15+ yrs ago, albeit working in a different capacity. It's still embarrassing to convulse and pee yourself in front of co-workers. I won't get into the abuse or assault but I've been through a lot.
No substances for me other than those prescribed. I stay away because I certainly could and might drink and smoke myself onto the self-destruction bus without looking back. FML
No substances for me other than those prescribed. I stay away because I certainly could and might drink and smoke myself onto the self-destruction bus without looking back. FML
I am feeling extra sad; lonely instead of alone. I'll have to choose a place to move pretty soon now. Moving is dismal and it sucks, and this time I"ll likely be going even farther away from the ocean. I'm trying to console myself with a promise to travel, to visit the ocean, but not sure it'll be in the budget in future.
So sorry they now think it is probably malignant and stage 4. Your SF friends will also be with you throughout this. Life is hard. So is death. It seems that very few of us 'go gently into that good night'. Am glad you have your church family to be with you. But death is something we all must do alone, even if we are surrounded by friends and family. But once we cross over, there will be loved ones waiting for us on the other side. But, hey. You are still with us now. Keep baking that bread to share!
