Went to hospital again. They wanted to use an NG tube to clear out the contents of my stomach. Shit sounded painful so I was like yeah, no...hopefully this heals at home.
most of us are broken in one form or another. my demise is chronic pain/illnesses, which caused severe depression and anxiety. there was a time that i knew it was better for me to just end it. i am better now. depression and anxiety are much better now and i constantly work on my physical issues so i have some hope. i hope that in time you can get the relief you need and hope for a better life. i came very close 3 times and i'm grateful every day that i was saved. thank god for SF or i'd be gone for sure
A grandparents as my caregiver.
My childhood aunt.
I have one more grandpa and aunt, but they're both ageing.
When I look at my own parents, as they are ageing but they are a reminder I have no one to turn too.
Actually the pressure of taking care of myself is intense and I fear that I cant, I keep fearing that I fail. Im so lucky my friend rejected my job for me lol when I wasnt thinking straight.
Should be a day off but I've been working on my new work. I feel excited to start doing it when I wake up and do an hour over coffee. Better than wasting time on Reddit and pays better π€£ Have to be careful I don't overdo working 2 jobs and make sure I don't screw up one or the other through rushing through stuff.
The weather seems to have cooled down and has gone gloomy. I am supposed to be meeting a long term friend later for a meal out. First time I've seen her - or anyone - socially in quite some time!!
Generally feeling OK. Positive as long as I can keep this second income stream going well.
Not great. Dealing with arm and wrist soreness which makes me wonder how I'm going to make money as a transcriptionist. But my previous job involved many hours of typing per day and I was okay. It's mostly my right wrist which may indicate mousing is an issue. I already have an ergo keyboard and mouse, but I don't always use them. Going to pay more attention and use my soft wrist braces.
i'm sorry that you are overwhelmed. procratination sucks, i get that way sometimes. maybe if you could get a little ahead on things you won't feel so overwhelmed . then hopefully your sense of dread and hopelessness can be improved
Went to hospital again. They wanted to use an NG tube to clear out the contents of my stomach. Shit sounded painful so I was like yeah, no...hopefully this heals at home.
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