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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
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My fiance made a "joke" about having to always pay for stuff for us. I don't remember exactly how he phrases it. It's because he offered to take my daughter and me to Key West for her 21st birthday, then when it came time to pay for the plane tickets he made that comment. It sours me on relationships, I like being on my own, I handle most things on my own except if the water heater goes or something like that.
Maybe you could express this sentiment to him. Maybe he won't appreciate it. However, if tactfully, done... It could alter the way in which he makes those snide remarks. For he may have no awareness into his affect on you, with or by his, seemingly to him and in his eyes, innocent comments. Or perhaps he feels that they are deserved? Anyway, only way to get any sort of place with this, is to have such a discussion. Unless you'd prefer, to not 'rock the boat!' ;D Best either way~
You're right, I think I'll wait and see if it happens again he's 64 now so I hope it doesn't get worse with age, cheapness. He's retired but also works 2 jobs, one to pay for his dental work and the other to pay down debt. Me, I'm debt free and don't have a credit card. Well, that's neither here nor there, maybe he's just tired. He really is a gentleman in all other respects....with a few quirks, ha. I guess life isn't perfect, right? Mr B.
Yes, all in all, then, maybe not such a bad thing? Huh, or hey? Eh? as we like to say here! Um, no I'd beg to differ on the no credit card debt thing... are you sure you're really a true-American? Just kidding..
If he's working two jobs in retirement I'd imagine that can get exhausting and/or taxing, and perhaps his statement of such, was more of a thinking out loud, or like printing receipts so to speak As if you didn't already know it, or this, already. Which is why it was doubly frustrating for you. And yes, quirk-free, does sound a bit boring, at least to me. But I tend to prefer interest to the blank slate. Then again, I am not every-one. Believe it or not? A gentlemen, well, those can be hard to find these days, and are perhaps a bit "old fashioned?" You know some people are just extraordinary petty though, and kind of particular about their money. So they'll spend some on you, but only with the appropriate or associated guilt-trip that is involved, or comes along with it. I don't know if that's necessarily what's going on here. As you were there, and in the room for presumably all others (unless done over the phone), then I'd say your read or view on this is an exceptional one, in terms of your perception and its overall degree of accuracy. There are crimes, and their are mysteries in marriages, I am told or so I am led to believe. But so maybe this is not one battling to the death over, or for, if you can accept it for what it's worth. And give it it's proper or appropriate emphasis. That said, it could get a little annoying and tedious or old over time, in my estimation. 
I'm not sure? do people generally get less petty as they age? Usually, they get softer, or kinder nicer. And if not, less mean, maybe? But overall perhaps they don't change all that much. However, the only way you'd ever have any chance of changing this habit or behavior, is if he is first made aware of both it, and its effect it has on you. So it is then left to you, to decide what to do! Sorry, if I've talked myself & you into so many circles that you are now back at square (one). . : D my bad, if so~?*
If he's working two jobs in retirement I'd imagine that can get exhausting and/or taxing, and perhaps his statement of such, was more of a thinking out loud, or like printing receipts so to speak As if you didn't already know it, or this, already. Which is why it was doubly frustrating for you. And yes, quirk-free, does sound a bit boring, at least to me. But I tend to prefer interest to the blank slate. Then again, I am not every-one. Believe it or not? A gentlemen, well, those can be hard to find these days, and are perhaps a bit "old fashioned?" You know some people are just extraordinary petty though, and kind of particular about their money. So they'll spend some on you, but only with the appropriate or associated guilt-trip that is involved, or comes along with it. I don't know if that's necessarily what's going on here. As you were there, and in the room for presumably all others (unless done over the phone), then I'd say your read or view on this is an exceptional one, in terms of your perception and its overall degree of accuracy. There are crimes, and their are mysteries in marriages, I am told or so I am led to believe. But so maybe this is not one battling to the death over, or for, if you can accept it for what it's worth. And give it it's proper or appropriate emphasis. That said, it could get a little annoying and tedious or old over time, in my estimation. I'm not sure? do people generally get less petty as they age? Usually, they get softer, or kinder nicer. And if not, less mean, maybe? But overall perhaps they don't change all that much. However, the only way you'd ever have any chance of changing this habit or behavior, is if he is first made aware of both it, and its effect it has on you. So it is then left to you, to decide what to do! Sorry, if I've talked myself & you into so many circles that you are now back at square (one). . : D my bad, if so~?*
Yes, all in all, then, maybe not such a bad thing? Huh, or hey? Eh? as we like to say here! Um, no I'd beg to differ on the no credit card debt thing... are you sure you're really a true-American? Just kidding.. If he's working two jobs in retirement I'd imagine that can get exhausting and/or taxing, and perhaps his statement of such, was more of a thinking out loud, or like printing receipts so to speak As if you didn't already know it, or this, already. Which is why it was doubly frustrating for you. And yes, quirk-free, does sound a bit boring, at least to me. But I tend to prefer interest to the blank slate. Then again, I am not every-one. Believe it or not? A gentlemen, well, those can be hard to find these days, and are perhaps a bit "old fashioned?" You know some people are just extraordinary petty though, and kind of particular about their money. So they'll spend some on you, but only with the appropriate or associated guilt-trip that is involved, or comes along with it. I don't know if that's necessarily what's going on here. As you were there, and in the room for presumably all others (unless done over the phone), then I'd say your read or view on this is an exceptional one, in terms of your perception and its overall degree of accuracy. There are crimes, and their are mysteries in marriages, I am told or so I am led to believe. But so maybe this is not one battling to the death over, or for, if you can accept it for what it's worth. And give it it's proper or appropriate emphasis. That said, it could get a little annoying and tedious or old over time, in my estimation. I'm not sure? do people generally get less petty as they age? Usually, they get softer, or kinder nicer. And if not, less mean, maybe? But overall perhaps they don't change all that much. However, the only way you'd ever have any chance of changing this habit or behavior, is if he is first made aware of both it, and its effect it has on you. So it is then left to you, to decide what to do! Sorry, if I've talked myself & you into so many circles that you are now back at square (one). . : D my bad, if so~?*
If he's working two jobs in retirement I'd imagine that can get exhausting and/or taxing, and perhaps his statement of such, was more of a thinking out loud, or like printing receipts so to speak As if you didn't already know it, or this, already. Which is why it was doubly frustrating for you. And yes, quirk-free, does sound a bit boring, at least to me. But I tend to prefer interest to the blank slate. Then again, I am not every-one. Believe it or not? A gentlemen, well, those can be hard to find these days, and are perhaps a bit "old fashioned?" You know some people are just extraordinary petty though, and kind of particular about their money. So they'll spend some on you, but only with the appropriate or associated guilt-trip that is involved, or comes along with it. I don't know if that's necessarily what's going on here. As you were there, and in the room for presumably all others (unless done over the phone), then I'd say your read or view on this is an exceptional one, in terms of your perception and its overall degree of accuracy. There are crimes, and their are mysteries in marriages, I am told or so I am led to believe. But so maybe this is not one battling to the death over, or for, if you can accept it for what it's worth. And give it it's proper or appropriate emphasis. That said, it could get a little annoying and tedious or old over time, in my estimation. I'm not sure? do people generally get less petty as they age? Usually, they get softer, or kinder nicer. And if not, less mean, maybe? But overall perhaps they don't change all that much. However, the only way you'd ever have any chance of changing this habit or behavior, is if he is first made aware of both it, and its effect it has on you. So it is then left to you, to decide what to do! Sorry, if I've talked myself & you into so many circles that you are now back at square (one). . : D my bad, if so~?*
i'm sorry that you are going through this @Pebble mouse . do you have meds that can help ? i hope you get over this soon, and please know that we care about you
mike....
mike....
i hope this doesn't ruin your relationship. i think you may want to discuss this with him calmly of course. see if he does expect you to pay for certain things. i'm old school if i invite someone i pay period unless i make an arrangement ahead of time to the contrary. it's possible it was just a bad joke so just let him know it bothered you
mike....
mike....
cheap frugal tight etc. can be hard on some people. when i had a cb my handle was squeaky because i was so tight i squeaked lol. i made my wife keep adding water to the ketchup bottle until it was clear, if there was mold on the loaf of bread my wife wanted to throw it out, my solution was remove the mold and it was fine. i had a lot of cheap tricks to save money, and we were doing ok. if he is retired with two jobs he may be watching the pennies a little when he can. cheapskates can change i did
mike....
mike....
