How Are You Feeling Right Now?

[1964dodge]

Sorry Mike. Tis a painful price we pay for loving our pets.

thanks barb

mike.....

 

[1964dodge]

I'm sorry to hear of the time frame change. Losing dogs SUCKS.

thank you janis

mike....

 

[AvidFan]

Groggy. I did wake up at 4.50am which was very frustrating, but I refused to get up at that time, so took a herbal concoction and went back to bed, didn't sleep deep but next time I looked at the clock it was 9.20am, so got some sleep even if it was light and drifting and interrupted in the middle of the night. Technically I was waking up with the sun as sunrise was 4.46am but am not sure if that's the reason as I've slept through on other nights.

 

[1964dodge]

I'm so emotionally worn down that I’m not thinking straight. Logically this would be a good time to use my coping skills. If I were still drinking, this is precisely the type of feeling that I would get falling down drunk in order to escape. I am having trauma flashbacks and recurring nightmares and it’s overwhelming. I feel paralyzed in that I know what to do, but at the same time it feels hopeless. Today is going better than yesterday, though.

 

[1964dodge]

Tired but at least that's Monday over. Had all the symptoms of hypoglycaemia even though you're not supposed to have it unless you have diabetes, which I don't but I hadn't eaten all day and get this sometimes. Was shaky and dizzy on the train so I bought a pack of chocolate biscuits from corner shop (actually 2 packs as it was buy 2 on offer) and that sorted me out, albeit ruined my calorie count for the day. Couldn't face the walk home from the train station but the bus came only 5 minutes late so I got on that. Now wondering whether there's any point cooking as I've ruined my appetite with biscuits 🤭

you don't need to be diabetic to have a bout of hypoglycemia. when i was much younger i had to always have candy in the glove compartment just in case. it may be a good idea to have something for breakfast even if it's just toast, and have some sort of candy or peanutbutter crackers on you at all times

mike....

 

[1964dodge]

Really low

i'm sorry she treats you this way

mike....

 

[1964dodge]

The leasing manager laughed at me and called me crazy today... she has been a bully.... she makes me feel so worthless..

 

[AvidFan]

you don't need to be diabetic to have a bout of hypoglycemia. when i was much younger i had to always have candy in the glove compartment just in case. it may be a good idea to have something for breakfast even if it's just toast, and have some sort of candy or peanutbutter crackers on you at all times

mike....

Good thinking. I'm lucky I pass about 1000 shops that sell biscuits usually! It looks likely that I had it then.

 

[1964dodge]

i got up at 3:30 this morning. i had to deal with a small issue but it was enough to wake my brain all the way. i tried to go back to sleep but got up for good around 4:30.

i went to the doctor for my physical. everything went well. physically doing about the same, except wheezing in the lungs, this happens some times. he thinks my mental health is doing much better. i was there for over an hour actually an hour and 45 minutes. i'm also finally starting to lose weight again and my a1c is getting better so i'm doing pretty good today

mike....

 

[AvidFan]

Ok so far today. Seem to be fluctuating between feeling a complete zen calm and a terrible spiral of anxiety. Like I'll be OK most of the time but then become convinced there's a serious problem with my health, house or finances and start to overthink it all to the point of near panic. Then the next minute I'll feel Ok and that even if there are problems I can work on sorting them out and nothing is going to impact me in the short term. Then the anxiety will spike again. Possibly due to medication withdrawal/rebound, in fact likely this is part of the process, just need to try to ride it out.

 

[Livelife]

Deep sadness. It’s with me from the moment I wake up every single day

 

[AvidFan]

Deep sadness. It’s with me from the moment I wake up every single day

Sorry to hear of your pain and I hope it will get a little easier each day.

 

[MisterBGone]

The leasing manager laughed at me and called me crazy today... she has been a bully.... she makes me feel so worthless..

What the heck?!

 

[Livelife]

Sorry to hear of your pain and I hope it will get a little easier each day.

Thank you✨

 

[PrincessPure]

H'mm... I wonder~ Do you think? That all of this worry, and ('excessive?') concern, over your exam. Has led to it actually being harder for you to perform well enough & under the precise conditions and such. (that are) In order to pass? In other words, were you not so nervous, or anxious; more so than would be otherwise considered healthy or normal? Typical... Would it be any easier for you to succeed? I know how much it means. I know how hard it is, and what great difficulty to retain all of that knowledge, and by the means you are all required to do so. I've heard it gets much easier later on when working with patients in clinics and things. Than cramming everything in such a dry fashion. Memorize & regurgitate. Probably; possibly, sometimes soon forget. Also too, in the future, as some of these things come up again & again. I'd imagine it gets a little easier to remember, and to retain. But for now: you're stuck in the middle of it. Quite the fire-storm, indeed~ / Just keep trying your best princess. That is all that can be asked. And then let the results come as they may. Medicine and the practicing of. Probably doesn't always go according to calculations or plan. So you've got to be flexible, and able to adapt. Change to fit the problem, or the newfound & ever evolving diagnosis. I'd suppose, or estimate. As that's all I can do! Anyway. . . I think you're doing great! And wonderfully well so far. I've heard none of your patients are going to ask to see your scores from any individual given classes. Pass the schooling. Pass the boards. Etc. Rotations. Blah blah blah~*> See, I'm getting fatigued? And that's just in THINKING About it. Now imagine actually having to do it! Like you do. So, I guess you don't have to conjure up to much make believe imagery in order to fit the concise notions of what it might be like, in order to... be where it is you indeed are. In the here & the now~ *which is quite Impressive. When you think of it! almost like an olympic or professional athelet. in a way^ or a model/celeberity, actor entertainer. Somebody famous or who has attained that which is exceedingly difficult to achieve. You're on your way. Well on... & the path you take. It doesn't matter. For it is your own, and nobody else's* // I
d say enjoy the journye, but I'd suppose you don't see very much to enjoy at the particular moment. Unless you enjoy the arduous lifestyle~>

Couldnt have been more correct
I have created a monster for myself. And really its not that big a deal if i fail specially in the system in which i study. You can retake the exam over and over without having to retake the class or without paying anything. Some of my colleagues have failed their exams over 6 or 7 times before passing. And i guess i have only been nagging because im not used to sudying the whole matrial and then failing over a little mistake in the details. Thats what annoys me, that the profesor didnt rly let me talk the last time and failed me over my first sentence while he could just give me a lower score. But it doesnt matter in the end.
I watched a video of a youtuber who passed of cancer years ago and she was strong enough to go out and eat with her partner and laugh the day after she got her brain tumor diagnosis. I was asking myself, how is it possible....i stopped functioning for 3 days after just failing an exam in a system where failing is more common than passing. And yet she can do that. I guess i have first world problems after all.

 

[AvidFan]

A bit defeated. I set myself down to do some work and my brain just can't do it at the moment. It's not essential that I do this work, but it was nice additional income. I did it since September 2023 and earned quite a bit of income but I think I just burned my brain out (or my brain is not working currently for other reasons). I have other work which I find easier, to some degree (the fact it's paid 4-5 times the other work helps, meaning I don't have to do nearly as much work for the same income!) so it's not a disaster as yet. Just disappointing I have the option of doing some extra paid work but can't get my brain to engage 🤨

 

[Justagirl]

I feel sad, empty, with no hope, I feel lonely, I don't want to keep suffering.

 

[SillyOldBear]

tired, tired, tired of everything

 

[AvidFan]

I feel sad, empty, with no hope, I feel lonely, I don't want to keep suffering.

😢 Sorry to hear of your suffering.

 

[AvidFan]

tired, tired, tired of everything

😢 Sorry to hear you are so tired of everything. I wish I had something more constructive to say but my mind is drawing blanks lately, probably due to my own tiredness!