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How Are You Feeling Right Now?

Realized yesterday that I’ve been missing meals and been sleeping badly. Explains why I’ve been more than usual unfocused, annoyed and shaky. Still missed dinner yesterday and couldn’t get to sleep until late.

Have a doctors appointment in a few hours. Trying to decide how much I should try to fix myself up. I feel half-dead, might as well look the part. Or maybe I should shave. I don’t know.

Just trying to keep it together for a few more hours.
 
I'm sorry you feel that way. Do you want to say why?
i worked for such a long time to make others realize how worthless it was/is to be around me and try to talk or spend time with me. So now... everything i worked so hard to accomplish has finally happened. People no longer respond to my txts or emails... phone calls, the 2 gaming platforms i use, or snail mail. It's actually a good thing. That way less are affected by everything... and nothing at the same time. Less will notice.:( Can't find the right words to explain.
 
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AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
I'm calm but a little apprehensive. Lately I am calm and OK until I have to interact with people, and then my nervous system goes into a spin, my head starts fogging up and I start getting all kinds of body sensations and pains and anxiety. I'm naturally an introvert and people drain me generally, but with the medication crap the last 2 years it feels like my resilience to deal with it has been siphoned out of me. Used to be OK with a day like today - I've got 3 important back to back meetings, so am hoping I can get to 5.30pm sane and in one piece.
 

Windhover

meandering home
SF Supporter
i appreciate what you are saying. i kinda wish people would here as well. It's a bitter sweet thought and wish. i don't know how else to explain it right now. sry.... *confused
Sorry you feel it'd be better to be thought of as worthless @AmberMarie. It used to be something like that when I was having food issues, seemingly couldn't find detachment at all and needed control. It may be different for you. Here, you are valued just how you are. Have you been able to get out for walks in nature?
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
I’m feeling mixed. All the emotions. I am sitting outside on a beautiful day next to a beautiful creek, in the shade and eating a sandwich. So that’s nice. Aside from this, though, I have so much resistance to the self marketing work to find a job that I am wondering if my last job is to be my last job, forever.

I like having a job to do. I’m good at the work required of my field, and I’m knowledgeable about best practices and constant process improvement. I just hate the problem of having to find a way to stand out from the other 700 people vying for the same position. I’m going to have to bite the bullet and just do it. I’m sick to my stomach at the thought.
 

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