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if Its just a matter of when, then why should people care If its now?
- Thread starter ChimeraMonster
- Start date
- Tags existential angst nothing left suicidal thoughts
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I lived until my 12 years begging for god to kill me bc i though that at least i could have a way to go to heaven, someone had told me that a child is pure until its 12th year, and since suicide is a sin, and it would take me directly to hell. I remember crying for days, when i turned 12. Its hard to think a real answer to why would we go to hell for living longer. I know, sins are supposed to stack, bur arent the blessings and virtues the same? shouldnt they accumulate too? Well, for me they should, and they should weight way more than a sin too.
okay, at this point im just rambling. Point is. I dont know, no one knows, and at the end. Does it really matter?
I lived until my 12 years begging for god to kill me bc i though that at least i could have a way to go to heaven, someone had told me that a child is pure until its 12th year, and since suicide is a sin, and it would take me directly to hell. I remember crying for days, when i turned 12. Its hard to think a real answer to why would we go to hell for living longer. I know, sins are supposed to stack, bur arent the blessings and virtues the same? shouldnt they accumulate too? Well, for me they should, and they should weight way more than a sin too.
okay, at this point im just rambling. Point is. I dont know, no one knows, and at the end. Does it really matter?
That's why I said those newborn babies who die at birth are the lucky ones because they go straight to Heaven without suffering at all--whereas those of us who remain on Earth have to live many years and suffer. On the other hand, it would make sense if EVERYONE had to live a long life and suffer. But that's not what happens, because we here on Earth have to suffer while those babies went straight to Heaven without suffering at all.
That's why religion seems to hurt more than help. It's that thing about those dead babies that gnaws at me and it's that thought that sometimes triggers suicidal feelings and affects my fragile recovery. Don't any others of you have this same problem?
That's why religion seems to hurt more than help. It's that thing about those dead babies that gnaws at me and it's that thought that sometimes triggers suicidal feelings and affects my fragile recovery. Don't any others of you have this same problem?
I don't think if newborns that die at birth are lucky as they miss out on life.
But I am a weird Christian that believes in the after life and reincarnation until you are spiritually complete as it were. Sometimes we go to heaven at the end but sometimes we have to repeat and get our life lesson learned. That's why mediums say that if you commit suicide you are doomed to repeat another lifetime. I've always believed in mediums and the afterlife but I follow the path of Jesus Christ so I really don't follow religion too well. But we all end up in heaven - we just have to learn our life lessons which are several evolving lessons and I don't know what they are. Someone wrote a book detailing out the stages of spiritual development until one finally goes to heaven and that resonated with me. Kind of pulls in the psychic stuff and the practice of following Christ (the writer was a former priest).
But to return to the original question there is a lot to achieve in terms of spirituality before you die. It's tough and miserable but the end of it is glorious. I hope in any case. I just try to help people and the earth and hope not to have to repeat this life or any other. Nonexistence would be ok but of course a heaven would be better. But Hell would be reliving another life and that sometimes keeps me from suicide thoughts more often than not.
But I am a weird Christian that believes in the after life and reincarnation until you are spiritually complete as it were. Sometimes we go to heaven at the end but sometimes we have to repeat and get our life lesson learned. That's why mediums say that if you commit suicide you are doomed to repeat another lifetime. I've always believed in mediums and the afterlife but I follow the path of Jesus Christ so I really don't follow religion too well. But we all end up in heaven - we just have to learn our life lessons which are several evolving lessons and I don't know what they are. Someone wrote a book detailing out the stages of spiritual development until one finally goes to heaven and that resonated with me. Kind of pulls in the psychic stuff and the practice of following Christ (the writer was a former priest).
But to return to the original question there is a lot to achieve in terms of spirituality before you die. It's tough and miserable but the end of it is glorious. I hope in any case. I just try to help people and the earth and hope not to have to repeat this life or any other. Nonexistence would be ok but of course a heaven would be better. But Hell would be reliving another life and that sometimes keeps me from suicide thoughts more often than not.
Thanks for your answer. Yes, your point about Reincarnation makes sense. At least it makes much more sense than Heaven and Hell because in Christianity, the newborn baby that dies, goes straight to Heaven without suffering at all, which would make it Unfair for us who have to suffer on Earth. But in Reincarnation, the newborn baby that dies will reincarnate and then live out a normal life-span the same as the rest of us.
It's so horrible that a child would feel that way. I wish everybody got at least their first 12 years of life without having to suffer.
Hugs @TheChimeraMonster
Hugs @TheChimeraMonster
