As I said, I believed that phrase at first... But shes talking with other people. I tried to talk to her many times, and I have to write her a lot of greetings before she might even reply... But then she doesnt do this to other people... And she also misses a guy which was toxic to her (she said this). So even if she said that phrase... the actions say otherwise
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Loneliness is literally killing me...
- Thread starter painfully
- Start date
so months ago i got banned from the reddit suicidewatch, where i used to vent. I tried to appeal but nobody answered. Tried to appeal a month later and they silenced me so that I couldnt ask in 30 days... Then after 30 days I asked again, and they responded that I was mean to somebody else, which is just not possible... And silenced me permanently so I could not ask again.
Meanwhile, I posted in the depression reddit... But the same mod was in the two reddits, and banned me from there in the first days of posting... This time for what? Ofc, for bullshit...
So I had nowhere to post truthfully.. And that maybe somebody could see me and get interested...
I have been posting in r4r for months, which is to find a partner... And yesterday they sent me a message saying that if I want to keep posting I have to VERIFY myself to them, or they will keep deleting my posts in r4r, which is the most popular reddit for finding a partner. The verification asks a lot, write my username in paper and stuff... but then show my face and my full body and stuff, and I hate it... So basically, i got fucked again.
Even if somebody wanted to find me... She couldnt... Im got shut down from the most popular sites... I tired of this...
Meanwhile, I posted in the depression reddit... But the same mod was in the two reddits, and banned me from there in the first days of posting... This time for what? Ofc, for bullshit...
So I had nowhere to post truthfully.. And that maybe somebody could see me and get interested...
I have been posting in r4r for months, which is to find a partner... And yesterday they sent me a message saying that if I want to keep posting I have to VERIFY myself to them, or they will keep deleting my posts in r4r, which is the most popular reddit for finding a partner. The verification asks a lot, write my username in paper and stuff... but then show my face and my full body and stuff, and I hate it... So basically, i got fucked again.
Even if somebody wanted to find me... She couldnt... Im got shut down from the most popular sites... I tired of this...
i just thought that maybe this a "shadow" ban... my profile is 2 years old, public and full of posts and comments. its obvious that im not a bot or a scammer... maybe some mod didnt like me (like in suicidewatch) and decided to "ban" me. nothing assures me that even if send t hem that video they will let me post again, or that they will respect my privacy...
and when i got banned from the depression reddit something similar happened. first i could post normally... then i suppose the mod who hated me saw me, and filtered out my account, which made every post i made automatically removed. then i contacted the mods about this and got banned...
people are truly awful... im so tired of this...
this shit in r4r might very well fuck any chances i could have, no matter how remote...
and when i got banned from the depression reddit something similar happened. first i could post normally... then i suppose the mod who hated me saw me, and filtered out my account, which made every post i made automatically removed. then i contacted the mods about this and got banned...
people are truly awful... im so tired of this...
this shit in r4r might very well fuck any chances i could have, no matter how remote...
I went to “help” a technician in my company fix an AC unit. Basically, I just stood there holding the ladder for him and that was it... But it turns out the place we went to was a pretty big, luxurious house. The AC units were in two bedrooms that looked like they belonged to two girls around 18-24 years old. Each bedroom was as big as the master bedroom in my apartment... but on top of that, they each had another connected room just for the bed. One of them had a desk almost as big as a bed, and the other had her room full of clothes and random shit. But what really stuck with me was that there were quite a few Louis Vuitton and Rolex bags... And the other one had an Apple computer sitting on a dresser, so she didn’t even use it, because she used her other Apple laptop instead.
They have two cars. One was a €90,000 Dodge Ram, and I don’t know what brand the other one was, but it looked new as well, and it was electric.
The owner was in a pretty big office working on his computer, I think. I have no idea what that guy does for a living.
I barely saw the living room, but it was huge and spacious.
They had a garden with a swimming pool and what stuck with me was that nobody was even using the pool, there was only the guy in the house, but the massage jets were running, meaning they were burning through electricity like crazy even though nobody was using them... So you can tell they’ve got money...
It made me incredibly jealous. Meanwhile, I’m stuck in my shitty house, with damaged flooring, walls, everything. Roasting from the heat, soaking my chair and my bed with sweat... In my tiny shitty bedroom (which is the master one), putting up with my sister and the fucking shitty neighbours, and with my shitty bathroom where I barely fit. I’m never going to have a house like that, not even remotely. NEVER.
It makes me not want to live anymore. I just want to cry and die...
They have two cars. One was a €90,000 Dodge Ram, and I don’t know what brand the other one was, but it looked new as well, and it was electric.
The owner was in a pretty big office working on his computer, I think. I have no idea what that guy does for a living.
I barely saw the living room, but it was huge and spacious.
They had a garden with a swimming pool and what stuck with me was that nobody was even using the pool, there was only the guy in the house, but the massage jets were running, meaning they were burning through electricity like crazy even though nobody was using them... So you can tell they’ve got money...
It made me incredibly jealous. Meanwhile, I’m stuck in my shitty house, with damaged flooring, walls, everything. Roasting from the heat, soaking my chair and my bed with sweat... In my tiny shitty bedroom (which is the master one), putting up with my sister and the fucking shitty neighbours, and with my shitty bathroom where I barely fit. I’m never going to have a house like that, not even remotely. NEVER.
It makes me not want to live anymore. I just want to cry and die...
i have a job interview. if i get it, ill get a small raise, not high... ill have to learn a ton of new stuff and have responsibilities... tbh, it motivates me a bit, and it scares me at the same time... but the problem is, even with this motivation... the loneliness is there killing me. it doenst matter which job i have, it will always be there...
and even tho i could be "well paid" in this shit country that it still shit, it will take a lot of time to save up for even a mortgage... and im 36, ill be maybe 40 something when i can finally get a decent house. that with a lot of ifs...
and this would be basically the most ill ever earn in my life... more than this would requiere heavy social stuff... be an executive or the boss of a company or things that would basically be torture for me...
other people just get together and pay together... i have to do everything alone... and im very late too cause i only been working for 3 years...
i hate to live where i live, with my shit neighbors and shit aparment... i thought on fixing this apartment when i finally can kick out my disgusting sister... ill have to spend like 10k or more just for a facelift... thing is, one of my neighbors did an extensive renovation of her apartment and i could peek inside and it looks nice. but the bedrooms and the bathroom... look absolutely tiny. basically what they are and how they are in my apartment, but better... but its like, no matter how much you reform that, its still shit. i barely fit in my bathroom... and the other shit neighbors will always be there... its just demotivating... im trapped here...
and even tho i could be "well paid" in this shit country that it still shit, it will take a lot of time to save up for even a mortgage... and im 36, ill be maybe 40 something when i can finally get a decent house. that with a lot of ifs...
and this would be basically the most ill ever earn in my life... more than this would requiere heavy social stuff... be an executive or the boss of a company or things that would basically be torture for me...
other people just get together and pay together... i have to do everything alone... and im very late too cause i only been working for 3 years...
i hate to live where i live, with my shit neighbors and shit aparment... i thought on fixing this apartment when i finally can kick out my disgusting sister... ill have to spend like 10k or more just for a facelift... thing is, one of my neighbors did an extensive renovation of her apartment and i could peek inside and it looks nice. but the bedrooms and the bathroom... look absolutely tiny. basically what they are and how they are in my apartment, but better... but its like, no matter how much you reform that, its still shit. i barely fit in my bathroom... and the other shit neighbors will always be there... its just demotivating... im trapped here...
I got banned from one reddit where you could post to find someone. They say I broke the rules but not which one. I have read them and ofc I didnt break anything... I asked the mods which rule did I break and got an instant "we reviewed your case etc etc etc" bullshit. it was almost instant, less than 2 second, no human can write that fast, and much less "review my case".
Im so tired of reddit mods. Luckily it doesnt happen often, but its still very unfair and tiresome... And this shit really limits my options...
Im so tired of reddit mods. Luckily it doesnt happen often, but its still very unfair and tiresome... And this shit really limits my options...