Hello, it’s been a while since I posted here or even access this forum. There’s so much happening, but today I’m feeling at my limit and I need to talk to come one and put it out or I’m going explode.
I thought about talking about it with some friends but I notice that I don’t feel like trusting them that much, and it’s not like they aren’t good people, they’re cool, but I feel a bit scared of what they gonna tell me, if they gonna judge me or don’t take my feelings seriously. But I really need to talk about something I’m going through.
I used to go to art college some years ago, and I really liked it, but due to COVID and my anxiety (that got worse at that time) I dropped out. Time passed, I couldn’t find a job, and the ones I got it, they didn’t even gave me a chance to try (they fired me with like two days working, and I didn’t made any horrible mistakes, but that’s for another post). So I’ve been unemployed for a while, I only do some freelance art related sometimes, and that means I get a lot of pressure from my family, and I feel really guilty.
Because of that guilty, I started another graduation, cause my family always says I need to graduate at something. The thing is, this course I’m taking isn’t what I thought it was, and I really hated it, I’m half way through it, but I it’s been hard to finish the extra activities and obligatory internship (cause I can’t find anywhere hiring for internships). And I really dislike this course, I’m doing everything mediocre and I really feel like I’m not gonna be able to graduate. But the thing is, if I stop now, I know my family will get really angry and disappointed, and I’m really scared of that. So, I don’t know what to do and who to talk about it. I also feel like so unmotivated to do anything, like I don’t have energy even to get out of bed, how am I supposed to live like everyone else? What should I do?
I thought about talking about it with some friends but I notice that I don’t feel like trusting them that much, and it’s not like they aren’t good people, they’re cool, but I feel a bit scared of what they gonna tell me, if they gonna judge me or don’t take my feelings seriously. But I really need to talk about something I’m going through.
I used to go to art college some years ago, and I really liked it, but due to COVID and my anxiety (that got worse at that time) I dropped out. Time passed, I couldn’t find a job, and the ones I got it, they didn’t even gave me a chance to try (they fired me with like two days working, and I didn’t made any horrible mistakes, but that’s for another post). So I’ve been unemployed for a while, I only do some freelance art related sometimes, and that means I get a lot of pressure from my family, and I feel really guilty.
Because of that guilty, I started another graduation, cause my family always says I need to graduate at something. The thing is, this course I’m taking isn’t what I thought it was, and I really hated it, I’m half way through it, but I it’s been hard to finish the extra activities and obligatory internship (cause I can’t find anywhere hiring for internships). And I really dislike this course, I’m doing everything mediocre and I really feel like I’m not gonna be able to graduate. But the thing is, if I stop now, I know my family will get really angry and disappointed, and I’m really scared of that. So, I don’t know what to do and who to talk about it. I also feel like so unmotivated to do anything, like I don’t have energy even to get out of bed, how am I supposed to live like everyone else? What should I do?