Ideas & Opinions Soft Heartbreak

[Dante]

Im not sure if I mentioned this on the forum before, but here goes anyway.

I spent my entire life pushing down my feelings and trying to act like a normie, so despite how much progress I have made I'm still pretty bad at venting my feelings so even after I have processed as much as I can, a whole mass of emotion, positive and negative, tends to get buried away and slowly weighs me down. I try to find vents for it, but it can be hard. My last go-to is "soft heartbreak".

TV shows, books radio series, podcast, whatever, shows try to make an impact and a lot of smart people with a lot of life experience try to hit our buttons in these shows. Some of them work and you end up balling your eyes out at some tragic scene or beautiful plot development. I call these moments "Soft Heartbreak". A moment where you can easily open the floodgates and cry, not just for the story, but you can lump all your pent up feelings into the moment and cry in earnest. It is heartbreak because it feel like it, but it is soft because after the moment passes you can carry on refreshed from the experience, rather than burdened by some terrible reality.

I've been in a funk all day so I dug up an episode with a strong soft-heartbreak scene and now I feel all better Its important to find whatever way you can you help you process things.

One caveat though, if there is simply too much behind the floodgates, soft heartbreak can just end up drowning you in all your emotion... so be wary if you really are struggling.

 

[Pearl12]

Ah, I know the feeling. I was like, scream-crying when I got to the end of To The Moon. I was really glad my mom wasn't home. Needed that.

Could really use it again, tbh. Doesn't seem like something you can intentionally induce though.

 

[seabird]

I haven't been able to cry since my little brother died. I really need one of these soft heartbreaks, but honestly am scared I'd go to pieces. There's trauma down inside and I have put in plalce emotional/mental boulders keeping it from hurting me further.

 

[Dante]

Ah, I know the feeling. I was like, scream-crying when I got to the end of To The Moon. I was really glad my mom wasn't home. Needed that.

Could really use it again, tbh. Doesn't seem like something you can intentionally induce though.

I can. I have a short list of guaranteed tear-jerkers for myself. I use them very sparingly, but if I need to, I queue up those episodes or film scenes and hey presto.

I haven't been able to cry since my little brother died. I really need one of these soft heartbreaks, but honestly am scared I'd go to pieces. There's trauma down inside and I have put in plalce emotional/mental boulders keeping it from hurting me further.

Yea, thats what I was warning about, too much behind the flood gates, but you need to face it eventually....

 

[seabird]

thats what I was warning about, too much behind the flood gates, but you need to face it eventually....

I am glad you've brought it up in the thread. Because for a while now, I've felt it's time to face it & let it out. It's moldy and toxic, I think.

 

[Dante]

I am glad you've brought it up in the thread. Because for a while now, I've felt it's time to face it & let it out. It's moldy and toxic, I think.

I think we emotionally bury stuff not to avoid it entirely, but because the full brunt is too much. So finding a way to let it out piece by piece and process it may be helpful. Maybe try a tear jerker, see if you cry, if not, try one which hits closer to home, one whose topic is closer to the death of a brother, etc. But be prepared and its OK to cut it off again after, justy vent it bit by bit until its easier to process?

That was a "uneducated advice" segment by the exceedingly-amateur psychologist Dante. Best enjoyed lightly seasoned (a pinch of salt recommended)