A "People Watching" Thread by Dante, and mercifully proof-read by Auri.
I was chatting to Auri about the TV show she ditched me for two and a half hours to watch when she suggested that the fact that she had to ditch me to watch it is perhaps the point. Before you think harshly, it is actually quite interesting and leads me into larger ideas.
Imagine you have a DVD/Blu-ray of your favourite film. Perhaps you have it saved on a streaming service like Shudder, Netflix, Amazon Video, Disney Plus etc. The point is, this favourite film of yours is on hand for you to watch at your leisure any time you want, but you don’t. We all have a film, or many, like this that we own but never end up watching. The reason we never end up watching it is because we don’t need to. We can always watch it later, we can always wait for a better time, the perfect time, the time that never comes, and if we do watch it, we may skip to our favourite bits or just get bored during the slow bits and wander off, because we can, because we have the freedom to do so. As a result we lose the sense of value of the film as a whole and we neglect to watch it at all.
Now say that same film comes on the TV. Even if you have it to watch later, because it’s on the TV, because it can’t be paused, skipped, moved to suit a better schedule, because it happens now, starts when it starts, ends when it ends and happens at its own pace, it once again has value. If you walk away for a minute you miss that minute, if you are 1 minute late you miss out, and if you are early you have to wait.
The greater our control over something, the less we value it, the more we take it for granted, and the more we neglect it, and as true as this may be for films, so it is for anything else.
It is the fleeting nature of our existence and experience that makes anything we seek in our lives valuable. The fact that we have so little control is what makes it exciting, makes it worthwhile. We don’t just "get" what we want, we have to look for it, chase it, discover it or simply wait until it finds us. When we do find it, the joy of that simple act of getting what we wanted is palpable, whereas if it was within our control to have it on demand, there would be no joy.
It is the fleeting nature of our existence and experience that gives our actions meaning. We have one chance to do things right, we can choose one option and no others in each moment. The fact that each second of our lives shapes the next and that there are no take-backs makes every second precious, every decision vital and full of life and meaning, every guess a gamble, and every sure choice a definitive moment in our unchanging history.
It is the fleeting nature of our existence and experience that lends value to our memories. We can never revisit them, and in the same way, we can never unmake them. Our memories are forever, in the exact same way that our experiences are fleeting. If we could revisit a moment we would have no need to remember it, no need to cherish that languid Sunday afternoon with the one you love, or still moment in time surrounded by the works of masters in a museum, or hilarious moment you tripped and fell flat on your face and everyone joined you on the floor in your shared laughter.
Every time we revisited a moment we would taint it, we would rob the moments of their value, the memories of their timeless nature.
In life, in decisions, in relationships, in all things, it is the ever changing and evolving and sometimes deteriorating and fading way of things that makes them, and us, so precious. If everyone lived forever, I think we would all be longing for death before long, perhaps long before our normally appointed time, and not just the members here.
To see the value in anything, we must stop trying to control it, and accept it for what it is, enjoy it whilst it is here, and cherish the memory of it when it is gone.
And that is why I shouldn’t be annoyed at Auri for ditching me.
I was chatting to Auri about the TV show she ditched me for two and a half hours to watch when she suggested that the fact that she had to ditch me to watch it is perhaps the point. Before you think harshly, it is actually quite interesting and leads me into larger ideas.
Imagine you have a DVD/Blu-ray of your favourite film. Perhaps you have it saved on a streaming service like Shudder, Netflix, Amazon Video, Disney Plus etc. The point is, this favourite film of yours is on hand for you to watch at your leisure any time you want, but you don’t. We all have a film, or many, like this that we own but never end up watching. The reason we never end up watching it is because we don’t need to. We can always watch it later, we can always wait for a better time, the perfect time, the time that never comes, and if we do watch it, we may skip to our favourite bits or just get bored during the slow bits and wander off, because we can, because we have the freedom to do so. As a result we lose the sense of value of the film as a whole and we neglect to watch it at all.
Now say that same film comes on the TV. Even if you have it to watch later, because it’s on the TV, because it can’t be paused, skipped, moved to suit a better schedule, because it happens now, starts when it starts, ends when it ends and happens at its own pace, it once again has value. If you walk away for a minute you miss that minute, if you are 1 minute late you miss out, and if you are early you have to wait.
The greater our control over something, the less we value it, the more we take it for granted, and the more we neglect it, and as true as this may be for films, so it is for anything else.
It is the fleeting nature of our existence and experience that makes anything we seek in our lives valuable. The fact that we have so little control is what makes it exciting, makes it worthwhile. We don’t just "get" what we want, we have to look for it, chase it, discover it or simply wait until it finds us. When we do find it, the joy of that simple act of getting what we wanted is palpable, whereas if it was within our control to have it on demand, there would be no joy.
It is the fleeting nature of our existence and experience that gives our actions meaning. We have one chance to do things right, we can choose one option and no others in each moment. The fact that each second of our lives shapes the next and that there are no take-backs makes every second precious, every decision vital and full of life and meaning, every guess a gamble, and every sure choice a definitive moment in our unchanging history.
It is the fleeting nature of our existence and experience that lends value to our memories. We can never revisit them, and in the same way, we can never unmake them. Our memories are forever, in the exact same way that our experiences are fleeting. If we could revisit a moment we would have no need to remember it, no need to cherish that languid Sunday afternoon with the one you love, or still moment in time surrounded by the works of masters in a museum, or hilarious moment you tripped and fell flat on your face and everyone joined you on the floor in your shared laughter.
Every time we revisited a moment we would taint it, we would rob the moments of their value, the memories of their timeless nature.
In life, in decisions, in relationships, in all things, it is the ever changing and evolving and sometimes deteriorating and fading way of things that makes them, and us, so precious. If everyone lived forever, I think we would all be longing for death before long, perhaps long before our normally appointed time, and not just the members here.
To see the value in anything, we must stop trying to control it, and accept it for what it is, enjoy it whilst it is here, and cherish the memory of it when it is gone.
And that is why I shouldn’t be annoyed at Auri for ditching me.
