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ToSupport for DID

extraterrestrialone

phoned home, no one answered
SF Supporter
#81
Ha. To the last sentence. Feel that and relate to losing superpowers. I will read it when a part can. I'm curious how alters exist if they don't take over the conscious body. Are they head mates as some people call parts who exist with no body?
for me it is an entity i call hijacker and also a person hijacker created and well, the other one is a sad story that i try to not believe so maybe i’ll tell another time but mainly hijacker is a persecutory alter who has caused me much trouble in my life especially with “self harm”.
 

Catch_22

Well-Known Member
#82
for me it is an entity i call hijacker and also a person hijacker created and well, the other one is a sad story that i try to not believe so maybe i’ll tell another time but mainly hijacker is a persecutory alter who has caused me much trouble in my life especially with “self harm”.
I think we talked about this before, it's familiar. How can it self harm if it doesn't take over your consciousness? Sorry if I'm confused rn. I will read up more on the go state thread later
Everything else I understand and also experience. The stuff you can't or don't want to talk about is okay. No pressure but if you want to I'm listening. You can also private message.
 

extraterrestrialone

phoned home, no one answered
SF Supporter
#83
I think we talked about this before, it's familiar. How can it self harm if it doesn't take over your consciousness? Sorry if I'm confused rn. I will read up more on the go state thread later
Everything else I understand and also experience. The stuff you can't or don't want to talk about is okay. No pressure but if you want to I'm listening. You can also private message.
its weird. i’ve found myself being told to hurt myself by hijacker and all i could do is obey. i wondered at the time why i could not resist but i could not. it is as if the signals of stopping had been disabled and i could only obey. it is as if being done by someone else. hard to understand and hard to believe but it is my experience.
 

Catch_22

Well-Known Member
#86
North-Pacific-Giant-Octopus.jpg
This is the North- Pacific-Giant-Octopus
It is a chameleon of sorts. I'm posting this as a new section titled:
WE ARE NOT FREAKS
Everybody knows the octopus is smart, and many know enough to know the octopus has an incredibly high intelligence. But did you know that this particular 🐙 is the largest ?! It lives about three to five years and grows to be anywhere from 70 - 100 lbs. The largest one ever found grew to be 156 lbs and 23 ft from tip to tip of the tentacles, which is pretty unheard of in most fishes, supposedly. It is also the most difficult to spot because it changes colors to protect itself from predators. It lives in the north Pacific ocean, along the continental shelf. Its range is expansive, all the way from southern California, north along the coastline arcing over the north Pacific, across the Aleutians toward Japan. " They can be found from the intertidal to depths of 2,000 feet. " - According to the alaska department of fish and wildlife. Since they can be found in shallow waters but have a range of depth, they can be spotted by divers. They have been seen changing colors and impersonating other animals and kelp. According to divers when in the kelp they waved their tentacles in the same fashion amongst the sea grass.
Just like multiples, these animals change the way they look and move depending on how they feel and where danger is. Just like multiples they can survive if a piece of a tentacle is bitten off. They have more to help them move along. But it's tiring and they must rest, just like us, somewhere hidden and safe. Just like multiples they are used to traveling in more than one environment and needing to protect themselves according to the environment they are in.
When multiples lose their sense of environment they cannot survive, that's where the d.i.d. labels come in. Big ole word just to say the defenses aren't working like they used to. The dysfunction happens from trying to survive as a color and shape changing animal when the environment suddenly changes to a foreign one, or if suddenly the habit or route if travel always known, was no longer an option, or some new factor was introduced or a relied upon species, removed. If suddenly the kelp disappeared, because in the new waters no kelp existed, for instance. Now, I do not know if octopuses are susceptible to the same disfunction as a dissociatively multiple human, if they were to be relocated to say, the Indian Ocean, but I believe the ability to re-adapt would be very difficult, even for such an intelligent animal, if it could survive at all.
This is in advocation for DIDawareness day which I missed by a week or more idk.
 
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A_J_R

Well-Known Member
#87
View attachment 43440
This is the North- Pacific-Giant-Octopus
It is a chameleon of sorts. I'm posting this as a new section titled:
WE ARE NOT FREAKS
Everybody knows the octopus is smart, and many know enough to know the octopus has an incredibly high intelligence. But did you know that this particular 🐙 is the largest ?! It lives about three to five years and grows to be anywhere from 70 - 100 lbs. The largest one ever found grew to be 156 lbs and 23 ft from tip to tip of the tentacles, which is pretty unheard of in most fishes, supposedly. It is also the most difficult to spot because it changes colors to protect itself from predators. It lives in the north Pacific ocean, along the continental shelf. Its range is expansive, all the way from southern California, north along the coastline arcing over the north Pacific, across the Aleutians toward Japan. " They can be found from the intertidal to depths of 2,000 feet. " - According to the alaska department of fish and wildlife. Since they can be found in shallow waters but have a range of depth, they can be spotted by divers. They have been seen changing colors and impersonating other animals and kelp. According to divers when in the kelp they waved their tentacles in the same fashion amongst the sea grass.
Just like multiples, these animals change the way they look and move depending on how they feel and where danger is. Just like multiples they can survive if a piece of a tentacle is bitten off. They have more to help them move along. But it's tiring and they must rest, just like us, somewhere hidden and safe. Just like multiples they are used to traveling in more than one environment and needing to protect themselves according to the environment they are in.
When multiples lose their sense of environment they cannot survive, that's where the d.i.d. labels come in. Big ole word just to say the defenses aren't working like they used to. The dysfunction happens from trying to survive as a color and shape changing animal when the environment suddenly changes to a foreign one, or if suddenly the habit or route if travel always known, was no longer an option, or some new factor was introduced or a relied upon species, removed. If suddenly the kelp disappeared, because in the new waters no kelp existed, for instance. Now, I do not know if octopuses are susceptible to the same disfunction as a dissociatively multiple human, if they were to be relocated to say, the Indian Ocean, but I believe the ability to re-adapt would be very difficult, even for such an intelligent animal, if it could survive at all.
This is in advocation for DIDawareness day which I missed by a week or more idk.
Compelling analogy and helps makes sense of DID. Thank you for sharing. The idea of changing as a means of survival is very poignant.

Also octopus are amazing.
 

extraterrestrialone

phoned home, no one answered
SF Supporter
#88
View attachment 43440
This is the North- Pacific-Giant-Octopus
It is a chameleon of sorts. I'm posting this as a new section titled:
WE ARE NOT FREAKS
Everybody knows the octopus is smart, and many know enough to know the octopus has an incredibly high intelligence. But did you know that this particular 🐙 is the largest ?! It lives about three to five years and grows to be anywhere from 70 - 100 lbs. The largest one ever found grew to be 156 lbs and 23 ft from tip to tip of the tentacles, which is pretty unheard of in most fishes, supposedly. It is also the most difficult to spot because it changes colors to protect itself from predators. It lives in the north Pacific ocean, along the continental shelf. Its range is expansive, all the way from southern California, north along the coastline arcing over the north Pacific, across the Aleutians toward Japan. " They can be found from the intertidal to depths of 2,000 feet. " - According to the alaska department of fish and wildlife. Since they can be found in shallow waters but have a range of depth, they can be spotted by divers. They have been seen changing colors and impersonating other animals and kelp. According to divers when in the kelp they waved their tentacles in the same fashion amongst the sea grass.
Just like multiples, these animals change the way they look and move depending on how they feel and where danger is. Just like multiples they can survive if a piece of a tentacle is bitten off. They have more to help them move along. But it's tiring and they must rest, just like us, somewhere hidden and safe. Just like multiples they are used to traveling in more than one environment and needing to protect themselves according to the environment they are in.
When multiples lose their sense of environment they cannot survive, that's where the d.i.d. labels come in. Big ole word just to say the defenses aren't working like they used to. The dysfunction happens from trying to survive as a color and shape changing animal when the environment suddenly changes to a foreign one, or if suddenly the habit or route if travel always known, was no longer an option, or some new factor was introduced or a relied upon species, removed. If suddenly the kelp disappeared, because in the new waters no kelp existed, for instance. Now, I do not know if octopuses are susceptible to the same disfunction as a dissociatively multiple human, if they were to be relocated to say, the Indian Ocean, but I believe the ability to re-adapt would be very difficult, even for such an intelligent animal, if it could survive at all.
This is in advocation for DIDawareness day which I missed by a week or more idk.
funny, at first glance i thought it was a sweater. i had to do some thinking readjusting to understand what i was seeing. i do think it is quite fascinating what you are explaining here. these days i need ot spend a lot of time thinking and rethinking. i may have more to say...
i guess i missed the DID awareness day also!
 

Catch_22

Well-Known Member
#89
I have a child alter that smokes cigarettes and weed. Weed wouldn't be a big deal, it's the smoking.
I can't explain the history so will just say there has been twenty years of quitting and external people triggering her to smoke.
I cannot survive where I'm at, how I'm being treated, and this alter smokes between 1-4 cigs a day. May seem nothing, but it's serious. I have a lung disease and lots of breathing probs.
I was just wondering if anyone could suggest ideas for how to help. Basically just imagine 10-15 yr old smoking cigs because of severe abuse and being silenced, furthermore, smoking was forced on this part by my family, to keep her silent, to keep the whole system silent, so I cannot punish this part. It will not be effective. I have tried to influence the system w education, fantasy smoking tricks and saying things like " I hate smoking smoking is nasty" whenever a part happens to show. Up and say it.
So far, nothing is working.
This alter cannot speak to anyone without smoking cigs because of the stress and people treat her like she is an adult and not a dissociated traumatized child alter. Her brain cannot be over 15 yrs old and I imagine she is made of parts who are all the ages beneath her. So it's a lot of kids in pain.
The other trigger is verbal and emotional abuse and the person doing it also forcing us to sh in this way and comfort in this way, because he won't get us supported. I can't escape the triggers. Can anyone help me figure out what to do when this alter emerges? Sometimes it's so automatic I can't prevent it I just wake up w a cig in my mouth. But other times I can. When the cig is in my mouth I try to take no more than three or four drags and put it out. That seems to help a whole cig getting smoked.
The biggest problem is there are automatic voices I don't understand and don't think are me, telling this alter TO smoke because we are ugly,stupid and going to die anyways because out life is fucked.
I don't want this voice having influence.
Ty if you read.
 

Catch_22

Well-Known Member
#90
I am REALLY done. It's completely worthless to have to always present your smartest best mind because if you show your regression or stupid parts, fragmented or damaged parts, everyone judges you as being that always. I hate being d.i.d. I hate it and I hate it because people are killing me over their shallow ignorance. -Tired
 

Catch_22

Well-Known Member
#92
Is there anything I could do that would help?

Sending safe hugs
Well, I certainly appreciate you asking that. I'm not sure personally right now..and not sure if that's what you meant or not..but what all traumagenic multiples need is moral people becoming more aware and educated on this form of trauma and being advocates for us in society. If you or someone else reading this, is interested, please dm for resources. -Rin & Pro
Thank you @may71 🙏
 

extraterrestrialone

phoned home, no one answered
SF Supporter
#93
I can feel their pain.
I hope it's ok to start a thread for DID, dissociative disorders.
I’ve encountered several people with DID over the past few years. I know I share many qualities with those people. I’m sad that they always seem to somehow disappear. I reach out to them and they seem to connect a little but then they vanish. I wish there was a way to let them know it is safe to know me. I joined a DID/Dissociative support group that has a site and local meetings, but i’ve found that group difficult to connect with and they have restrictive rules that seem to me to be isolating for them and for me so i’ve had difficulty connecting.

I have never been diagnosed professionally but as I mention in my Ego State Disorder thread (linked in my signature below), I believe that I have this disorder which is a dissociative disorder and very similar to DID. I do not have a problem with having my own self-diagnosis. I’ve mentioned it to some therapist/psychologists and while not embracing it, they did not seem to rule it out as possible. It also is a factor in diagnosing that (i believe) insurance companies will not accept that diagnosis as acceptable when it comes to insurance coverage. Nonetheless, my belief is that I am dissociative which no mental health professional disputes about me and i really do feel the pain that DID people present. I just wish that the unaccepting insurance companies and psychiatry/psychology people and others would read more about these conditions and understand what we (with “others”) go through. It is still prevalent that many regard it as a fake condition. I’m hoping for better understanding...
 

Astrid78

Not fit for society
#96
Ive been diagnosed with d.i.d. dont think I have alters but I dissociate all the time. A lot of what people have said here really resonates with me. Idk it's weird, usually I feel really alone in this and dont talk about it.
 

extraterrestrialone

phoned home, no one answered
SF Supporter
#97
i’m wondering if anyone knows and since i see two people with recent posts here, i’ll ask @personperson and @Astrid78 , i’ve never been diagnosed with DID or anything similar/related. i have about 10 other diagnoses some of which make sense and others that don’t, but i’ve self diagnosed with ESD (Ego State Disorder) which generally most people don’t know anything about but is similar to DID in that they both could have persecutory alters.

i know i have that. like i said, no one has diagnosed me in this way even though my present therapist in the intensive program i’m in is accepting of my beliefs pertaining to this.

but what i am dealing with is that though the alter never takes full control of the body so that i’m not aware, it can put me in situations where it disarms me so that i become unable to not do what it wants me to do to myself.

it is this feature that is so frightening because as a result i’ve been hospitalized several times over the past few years. i don’t want this to happen again and i can’t seem to find anything that can protect me from this persecutory alter.

i saw a video not too long ago, maybe posted by someone on this site, maybe even in this thread - i don’t remember. it was an interview of someone with DID and she described her situation with her alters as like driving a car but she was in the back seat and could not do the actual driving. this is so similar to my situation. i really need to make that stop. so i’m writing here now hoping someone has some thoughts/ideas/suggestions on this situation.

doctors, therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists tend to not do anything anymore for me like they want this disease to just run its course and whatever happens happens. i’m not getting properly treated and i don’t think it wise for me to just quit my therapy because there is some other value in it. but i hate the dangers i’m always faced with. i really am in danger from something very alive inside me. i just wish i knew what to do.
 
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extraterrestrialone

phoned home, no one answered
SF Supporter
#99
Am I understanding that your alter is preventing you from self harm, ratting you out? I just want to make sure I'm clear on what you are saying
sorry, i do tend to be unclear at times. my alter is able to keep me from disobeying its commands. that is, if it wants me to do stuff to myself, i’m not able to say no and not do it.
 

Astrid78

Not fit for society
sorry, i do tend to be unclear at times. my alter is able to keep me from disobeying its commands. that is, if it wants me to do stuff to myself, i’m not able to say no and not do it.
Got it, thanks for clarifying. While I dont have this exact thing, if I'm in distress I'll dissociate and sh or make statements. Wish I had more to offer you in way of advice, cause this shit is hard to "live" with.
 

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