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BPD Support Thread
- Thread starter Aurelia
- Start date
If I had to pick from the 4, then I would say discouraged. But I describe myself as a quiet BPD. I am a very quiet person, I have poor social skills, very shy, socially anxious, loner type person. Everything is inward, anger, depression, anxiety; it doesn't affect anyone but me. I've also had self destructive behavior in the past such as self harm, but I got better with that.
Does anyone else here feel like they have no control over their emotions? Like other things determine how you are going to feel? Such as people, things, situations, circumstances? The only time I feel like I have control over my emotions and actions is when I am by myself preferably in my apartment. But when I have to go out into the world and be around people, it seems like people have more control over my emotions than I do and thus can control how I am going to behave or act. It feels like you have no control over you emotions, behaviors, and actions, and that other people do. It feels chaotic, and dangerous, and unsafe, because anything can happen, you have control over nothing 
Does anyone else here feel like they have no control over their emotions? Like other things determine how you are going to feel? Such as people, things, situations, circumstances? The only time I feel like I have control over my emotions and actions is when I am by myself preferably in my apartment. But when I have to go out into the world and be around people, it seems like people have more control over my emotions than I do and thus can control how I am going to behave or act. It feels like you have no control over you emotions, behaviors, and actions, and that other people do. It feels chaotic, and dangerous, and unsafe, because anything can happen, you have control over nothing
My fiance takes forever in the shower. He's seriously worse than a female in that regard. The quickest might be like an hour and the longest might be up to two hours. So a little while ago, he says to me (as he's about to take a shower), "K. See you in 3-5 business days." LOL. It's funny because it's so true...
You are not old at all, although you may be like myself old in feeling. You are still young, pretty and a pleasant individual who deserves well today and also on your birthday. 
Would you say that your BPD has gotten better, gotten worse, or is the same?; as time goes on. I'm not even sure in my case. I'd like to think that it has gotten better compared to when I was younger. I read somewhere that for some people with BPD, it gets better on its own as they progress towards middle age, like maybe 40s and up. If that is true in my case, I guess I just have to hang on.