Sorry for you, Jolene. What strikes me as odd is that your despondency makes you binge-eat. In my case, it's different because whenever I feel despondent, I lose my appetite. Maybe it's because I'm a vegetarian.
Jolene, you said that your hope is lost. Then all you have to do is find it again, the same as you do when you lose your house keys. In this case, it's your emotions, so it's still there buried in your Subconscious, waiting to be recovered.