I know my last post was literally saying I feel better

[CBunny9]

And I really do feel better.

But today I found out an old friend’s sister committed suicide and all I feel is envy. I’m sad for my friend.

But I also now can’t stop thinking about suicide and how I want to be done with this world too.

I know this is so fucked up and I feel terrible that this is how I’ve reacted.

But goddamn leaving right now sounds great.

 

[arbitrarybarry]

I am glad to hear that you have been feeling better. I am sorry to hear this news has triggered some suicidal feelings, but I think it is healthy to honestly engage with the mixed feelings rather than supress them. It sounds like you are feeling empathy, envy, guilt, and ideation all at once. But do not forget how you were feeling before you got this news. Optimistic.

 

[Petal]

I am so sorry to hear your unfortunate news of a friend passing, could you call the samaritans and see if talking out loud could help you feel better?

Please do not think suicide is the solution, it might seem like it sometimes but at the end of the day you have gotten better recently and I believe time might heal these fresh wounds.

Keep talking to us. Do you have any family or friends around you? Are you safe?

 

[Were all together]

Why di do you feel like leaving, when you just met a "great guy"?

 

[Ella]

Why di do you feel like leaving, when you just met a "great guy"?

I have great people in my life. But Sadly doesn’t change how we feel & that’s insensitive

 

[Were all together]

I have great people in my life. But Sadly doesn’t change how we feel & that’s insensitive

What's insensitive? I just asked because she was happy she just met a great guy

 

[sinking_ship]

I get it CBunny. Even if I’m not actively suicidal sometimes a simple mention of it is enough to get me more preoccupied about it. Just try to remember the good things keeping you here, this will pass.

 

[CBunny9]

Why di do you feel like leaving, when you just met a "great guy"?

I have great people in my life. But Sadly doesn’t change how we feel & that’s insensitive

Thanks Ella I didn’t have the energy to say this lol

 

[CBunny9]

I get it CBunny. Even if I’m not actively suicidal sometimes a simple mention of it is enough to get me more preoccupied about it. Just try to remember the good things keeping you here, this will pass.

You’re right. Thank you.

 

[CBunny9]

I am glad to hear that you have been feeling better. I am sorry to hear this news has triggered some suicidal feelings, but I think it is healthy to honestly engage with the mixed feelings rather than supress them. It sounds like you are feeling empathy, envy, guilt, and ideation all at once. But do not forget how you were feeling before you got this news. Optimistic.

💕