I need warm vibes or thoughts or what ever belief system people have, to send my way. I have grand jury this Wednesday, for a day. I am on the jury and it is my fifth day serving this year. It is very painful to me and I tried to find my story on my previous post to add this to it, but I will explain a little since I could not locate the other post. I reported my mom's ex husband in 2002 in the town where I grew up and now live (I lived out of state when I filed it though.) He brutally abused me growing up physically and sexually and though I was within the statute of limitations to report the abuse, it did not go to court as the law enforcement called it a he said she said incident. Some people will think I am full of **** but I know what I went through and still suffer every day. The officer I reported to is at the grand jury for the part he has to present and this is very hard for me. He had asked me to call once years ago in response to this report and basically just laughed me off. I am not vindictive by any means but am more concerned about my mental state and how much pain I am in. If I could show you all how bad I hurt you could never believe all this. My mom's ex husband lives about two hours away, just a random note, and he is older and his health is failing. I feel very alone and I feel unloved.