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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
- Start date
Fed up. I've had some ideation today. More because I'm tired than a strong urge - it's just always there in my back pocket as a break glass emergency escape hatch. Surgery system has completely screwed up my pain relief prescription. The system clearly shows I had a repeat prescription on 23rd June. It also says I have no repeat prescriptions and have never had a repeat prescription of the medication. 🫠 The end result is being stuck in total limbo and as so many other things lately, nobody can sort it even if they're trying to be helpful. Don't even mention the fact the transport network has blocked my card in perpetuity because I used my old debit card last week. The bank won't honour the payment because it was on old card and have used new one, and there is no mechanism whatsoever to pay them or unblock the card - ever. That's where my top level complaint got me - sorry, no solution. Use another card... I could go on about shit systems that are making life very frustrating lately! But it would probably exceed the word count for a reasonable post! Also it's 30c 🫠
I have a lot of words pent-up wanting to come out, but all concerning things and people about which I cannot speak, at least not here. Wish I had a friend irl
It's one of the core questions that I land on after hours of thought on my current difficulties. 🤔
Yesterday I mistakenly ate some food that had monosodium glutamate/yeast extract; so I was woken up in the night with a massive headache and it's still with me
Why are relationships so hard?! 
Yesterday I mistakenly ate some food that had monosodium glutamate/yeast extract; so I was woken up in the night with a massive headache and it's still with me
I'm not being critical on myself, so much as of the universe. I had just woken up and sometimes I wake up in terror, because of flashbacks about inpatient "treatment". I wish I had gone to jail. At least then, I would have some explanation of wth I was being punished for. I'm doing my best to process/move on/accept it. But sometimes I just can't, especially when I start feeling bad before I've even fully woken up yet.
FWIW, I did get something done. I got outside for a walk, not so much for exercise as for fresh air. So that feels a little bit better. I have a virtual networking event in just over an hour. I have no idea what to expect or how to prepare, so I'm just going to show up virtually and do my best. Might have to bow out though if I'm on the verge of tears. Feeling like s#!t has one advantage. I'm not afraid to do things that I would be for fear of pain. What am I going to do? Hurt more? Whatever.
FWIW, I did get something done. I got outside for a walk, not so much for exercise as for fresh air. So that feels a little bit better. I have a virtual networking event in just over an hour. I have no idea what to expect or how to prepare, so I'm just going to show up virtually and do my best. Might have to bow out though if I'm on the verge of tears. Feeling like s#!t has one advantage. I'm not afraid to do things that I would be for fear of pain. What am I going to do? Hurt more? Whatever.
The main problem is gut-wrenching because I'm needing to help with a messed-up situation that's not mine but it is a loved one's. They're facing panic and despair. I'm aware of the philosophical viewpoint of attachment so please don't respond with that. I need to do some things which might help and yet will also cause a lot of waves elsewhere. Ffs nothing is ever f*ing simple
You're not only a real person, you're also a much better person than you give yourself credit for.
It sounds like you've been through a lot and haven't had many lucky breaks. Having physical deformities is probably difficult in itself, in addition to other people not being supportive. It sounds like you've also been through a rough childhood.
I'd much rather be friends with you than with Vladimir Putin, or a million other successful assholes. It seems to me like your flaws are superficial, and while having superficial flaws may be difficult, it's still better than having deep flaws and no superficial ones.
It sounds like you've been through a lot and haven't had many lucky breaks. Having physical deformities is probably difficult in itself, in addition to other people not being supportive. It sounds like you've also been through a rough childhood.
I'd much rather be friends with you than with Vladimir Putin, or a million other successful assholes. It seems to me like your flaws are superficial, and while having superficial flaws may be difficult, it's still better than having deep flaws and no superficial ones.
A couple of psychiatrists told me somehting stark but helpful years back during an extremely traumatic tie. They said that children will be harder on, and 'take it out on' the safe parent, or the parent who to them feels safest. ("Oh, great," I thought at the time, "more s*** to look forward to.") It turned out quite true, but it did help to know in advance it'd be happening.
When your ex trashtalked you to his own offspring, he was absolutely placing a red flag on his own head indicating that he is not safe. I'm sorry that happened to your child and to you @Lane. I know about how it goes first-hand, unfortunately.
You are a kind and strong person and a good parent. (h) if they help
When your ex trashtalked you to his own offspring, he was absolutely placing a red flag on his own head indicating that he is not safe. I'm sorry that happened to your child and to you @Lane. I know about how it goes first-hand, unfortunately.
You are a kind and strong person and a good parent. (h) if they help
Nobody should experience this much stress on a daily basis. My body is destroying itself with stress. The pain makes me stressed and the pain flares worse in response to stress. Feel sad that I unfortunately have a body that just causes itself pain instead of collapsing with a simple heart attack. I should be dead and wish I was.
