My grandmother had a stroke in February of this year. The day before that I found out my girlfriend had cheated on me and slept with someone. After we break up she starts dating a new guy and she doesn't know his last name. I constantly saw her in school with him, he was usually kissing her and grabbing her ass. After they broke up and we started talking things through, it seemed like maybe it would start being okay again. Then I gave her a ticket to my graduation and she didn't even come. Now I'm a graduate with no experience in anything but fast food and a one-year program I took in high school dealing with computers. I can't get a job because even the "entry-level" and internship jobs expect me to have 2 to 3 years of experience in the field, but I can't get experience because nobody will hire me. I don't want to go back to fast food or retail. I don't know why I wasn't enough and why I deserved to be cheated on. I was put into a facility for depression and suicidal thoughts before I graduated. My mother was worried I wasn't going to graduate and on top of that she had to deal with my lifelong depression suddenly being exposed while she's simultaneously dealing with her own mother's stroke. I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. Everybody always says that you get what you deserve. Maybe I deserved to be cheated on. Maybe I deserve to feel guilty for putting my mother through all of the worry. If I do deserve it then there's not point in me being alive anymore. If I don't deserve it and this is just life's way of showing me that it's a bitch then I don't want to live in a world where I try so hard to be a good person only to be shit on by forces outside of my control. Either way I'm done